3/09/2004

It's Gonna Take a Tall Man:
Oh, the anal probling that John Kerry is undergoing right now. Oh, the colonscopy that he must endure. As Republicans seek anything, man, fuckin' anything to bring down this tall, tall man who's actually givin' the war President a contest. Bush is out there, man, flailin' about like that waiter on The Sopranos that Christopher hit in the head with a brick. Here's the Prez, trying his best not to quiver his bottom lip, attacking Kerry for Kerry actually thinking that after the Cold War, maybe we could cut defense spending. Bush spends an awful lot of time probing Kerry's records for these "flip-flops," "waffles," and changes of heart. (The Kerry campaign would do well to check out this list of Bush's flip-flops at Daily Kos.)

Other spawns of the Rovean hell of the Bush/Cheney campaign are attempting to eviscierate the tall man. Citizens United, a group of vicious attack bitches, is going to start running its parody of the Mastercard "Priceless" ad about John Kerry, attempting to demonstrate that the tall man is, well, rich: "Massachusetts Senator John Kerry. Hairstyle by Christophe's $75. Designer shirts: $250. Forty-two foot luxury yacht: $1 million. Four lavish mansions and beachfront estate: Over $30 million. Another rich, liberal elitist from Massachusetts who claims he's a man of the people. Priceless." You get it, you fuckin' yahoos and NASCAR droolers? Kerry is rich and from the East Coast, unlike, say, Bush, who's, well, rich and from the East Coast. It's just goddamn embarassing to see the President, in the guise of his "official duties" prancing around a rodeo. There's clowns and horses there. Bush had to be scared shitless. (Kerry's best line this week was about this: "If the president of the United States can find time to go to a rodeo, he can spend more than one hour before the [9/11] commission."

And there's the noxious bit of worm spittle from Gary Aldrich, where the former FBI agent, now lackey of the right wing sodomizin' machine, derides the tall man's heroism in Vietnam as being not all that heroic in killing a Vietnamese soldier to save a fellow American because "evidence suggests the Vietnamese soldier had previously been wounded by a 50-caliber round." Because, you know, there's so much you can be sure of when you're leapin' off a boat in the middle of a battle to rescue someone.

The sad thing about Bush is the lack of self-awareness. He doesn't understand that a reasonably well-trained chimp could be nominated by the Democrats, and that chimp would be ahead of him in the polls right now. Re-elections are not about the opponents of the incumbents. Re-elections are about the person in office. By Bush making his campaign speeches so much about Kerry, he's demonstrating how empty his presidency has been - how devoid of success, how devoid of ethics, how it's just so many lies - Bush is like a wifebeater who tells his wife that he loves her and won't she please take him back? Even if he promises he won't smack her again? Nope, it's all lies. And Bush is the pathetic center of the lies - and he will try to take down all of us into his mire of hate and retribution before it's all over.

It'll keep comin', you know. All of the accusations, all of the probing. There will be lies and distortions. But here's the deal: Kerry's a tall man. And tall men stand above all of those who crawl around on the ground, picking up the rocks and dirt that fall off the shoes of the tall men.