3/08/2004

Facts Are For Suckers:
Much, much, much has been written on how the Bush Administration regards facts in the same way that an AIDS-ridden crack whore regards condoms: why bother with them now? Check out Eric Alterman's latest column at the Center for American Progress.

While much, much, much ink and many, many, many hours of video have been spilled over the egregious, despicable, verminous, bottom-dwelling use of actual 9/11 images (and faux firefighters) in two of the Bush/Cheney ads, relatively little has been said about the third ad, the one that features George and Laura and images of, one presumes, actors acting like workers and average people. (It begs the question of whether or not real workers could even be found.) Here's the script in all its odious glory, missing, of course, the oh-so-cute sound of the inability of Bush to pronounce the "America" as a word with four syllables (the Rude Pundit doesn't know about you, but he doesn't live in "Uhmerka" and he is not an "Uhmerkan," but maybe that's the planet Bush lives on since he sure as shit doesn't live here or maybe it's a weaselly way of getting out of any of his claims since he can say, "I wasn't talking about 'A-mer-i-ca,' I was talking about 'Uhmerka,'" but we digress):

President Bush:
One of the things that must never change is the entrepreneurial spirit of America. This country needs a President who clearly sees that.

Laura Bush:
The strength, the focus, the characteristics that these times demand.

President Bush:
And as the economy grows, the job base grows and somebody who's looking for work will be more likely to find a job. I know exactly where I want to lead this country; I know what we need to do to make the world more free and more peaceful. I know what we need to do to make sure every person has a chance at realizing the American dream. I know what we need to do to continue economic growth so people can find work, to raise the standards at schools so children can learn, to fulfill the promise to America's seniors. Americans are hard working, decent, generous people. I'm optimistic about America because I believe in the people of America.

Now, this begs so many fucking questions it's hard to even get one's mind around it. First, the obvious question, which is if Bush knows "exactly where I want to lead the country," and knows all the other shit he claims to know, why doesn't the fuck doesn't he deign to share it with us? Because this is par for the course with Bush: we know, but don't you worry your poor little heads about it. When we feel we can reveal it to you, we will. Noblesse oblige, motherfuckers. And divine right of kings. We govern upon you.

Other questions? So, like John Kerry doesn't see the entrepeneurial spirit? So, like that job report that showed virtually all the jobs created by the "economy" last month were created by the government, which, as far as the Rude Pundit can tell, is not supposed to be in the entrepeneurial business? And, so, like, if Bush knows what to do, why the fuck hasn't he done it so far? Or is what Bush "knows" wrong, like so many other "facts" Bush claims to have known in the past?

And the commercial itself, with its Aaron Copeland meets a pussy piano player sentimental music, with its multiculti images of an America that has nothing to do with the America Bush has created. This is not America. In fact, it is Uhmerka, a place where values are defined by those in charge, not by those who vote.

But, fuck, and, why not, who cares? As long as the Republicans have a line they can stick by until it stays in your head like the Oscar Meyer Weiner song. Here's the line: "President Bush has provided strong moral leadership for America in historic times," from a press release from Tom "Tony Montana" DeLay.

And vague variation #1: "The President has provided steady leadership in remarkably changing times," from Rep. Henry Bonilla of Texas. Ditto from Terry Holt: "President Bush has provided steady leadership."

Vague variation #2 from the Missouri Senate President Pro Tem: "President Bush has proven his ability to be a steady leader in changing times." That one is from the "statement" of Missouri Republicans endorsing Bush.

From David Dreier of California on February 26: "President Bush has provided our country with steady leadership in times of historic change." And a February 25 "statement" from Minnesota Rep. Gil Gutknecht: "President Bush has been a strong leader for America during these times of historic change." From Ohio Rep. Ney, who throws it all in: "President Bush has provided steady and strong leadership for America as we face great challenges in these historic times."

So far, on this hit parade, all of the quotes have come from press releases of the Bush/Cheney campaign. Christ, you'd almost think these "releases" were written for all these honorable citizens. Terry Holt also tried this out on CNN on February 17: "We think the president has been a strong and steady leader during dangerous and changing times."

Remember, unlike other times, these are "historic" and "changing." Every other time? A wallow in sameness and tedium. And Bush is "strong" and "steady," unlike that batshit insane pussywhipped cocksucker that wants his job, right? Right?

And through it all, we out here, in the real world, not the fantasy world of the Bush ads, we who live the historic, changing times, in the actual America, know every time we see Bush's face: he lied, he lies, he'll keep lying.