8/20/2019

If You're Not Anti-Fascist, You're Pro-Fascist

This weekend, I called the Proud Boys and other marching fascist fucknuts "Nazis." When this was posted by a pal on Facebook, one of his FB friends was quick to say that this was tin foil hat-worthy and that I was degrading history. I explained that I called them "Nazis" because they want to kill all Jews and non-whites and that the easiest way to explain to people what the marching fascist fucknuts support is to call them "Nazis." See? You automatically think, "Oh, shit, they wanna do some genocide." I know this because of all the hate-tweets and hate-messages I get telling me that I'm a Jew (which I already knew) and will be exterminated.

But, obviously, I was insulting the marching fascist fucknuts.

On Sunday morning, I made the mistake of turning on the television. I try to avoid the Sunday gabfests like they are testicle-eating lizards hungry for more testicles. And then I made the bigger mistake of thinking, "Huh. Wonder what bullshit they're slinging over on Fox 'news'?" There, on the Doocy-free weekend Fox and Friends (Who Are Blonde), the top story was that evil Antifa was going to rampage through Portland, Oregon, and that they were throwing food at some people. 

Indeed, on its website, Fox referred to the events in Portland as "planned protests involving supporters of the far-left Antifa movement and supporters of several conservative groups." You see that? Antifa is "far-left" but the white supremacists and, you know, Nazis? They are just "conservative groups." Another piece called Antifa "one of the core drivers of violence" in protests right now.

Yes, in other articles and on-air pieces, Foxeteers have spoken out against "Antifa and far-right" groups. No less a motherfucker than Sean Hannity said, "To each and every single person on either side that has an extreme agenda, you must stop this insanity — this lawlessness." The Chin of Doom declared that Antifa and white supremacists are two sides of the same coin: "They're all tied to sick, ugly, twisted, evil ideologies." And we should kumbaya ourselves out of any conflict: "Let's not forget, we can have political disagreements but at the end of the day, we are all Americans. We're all created equal. We're all one nation under God."

But the context is so fucked up. It's saying that white nationalism, Neo-Nazis, and other assorted racist, heinous, violent shitheels should be given the same consideration as those whose ideology is (checks a dozen websites) stopping white nationalism, Neo-Nazis, and other assorted racist, heinous, violent shitheels. Oh, and also support immigrant rights, health care for all (including white supremacists), and other mainstream progressive ideas. In other words, it's fascists versus, you know, anti-fascists. Seems pretty easy to pick a fuckin' side here.

I'm not saying that Antifa groups and individuals haven't committed violence. Every movement has moments of violence, but incidents are isolated and blown out of proportion, usually by whiny pukes like "journalist" Andy Ngo, who is desperately trying to grift his way into relevance. Hell, in Portland, Ngo just outright lied about supposed violence. And, honestly, you know how fucking lame you look crying about a tossed milkshake and some Silly String sprayed at you when people on the right are literally shooting children to death for being non-white? Also, violence and threats against Antifa supporters are far more prevalent than violence against, for lack of a simpler word, Nazis.

Of course, conservatives have to condemn Antifa because they'd lose a big percentage of their base of inbred mutants and anxious pigfuckers if they said, "You know what? I'm anti-fascist. Cut this Nazi shit out." It's no different than the condemnation of anti-war protesters or civil rights marchers in the past. Right-wing bitches will be right-wing bitches.

Gotta say, though, this is some weird ass shit. The right in this country just wants to erase all the history that makes it uncomfortable. Yeah, let's pretend that the rise of the Nazis in Germany happened overnight, not that it took years of propaganda and refusal to take the threat seriously before things got all Holocausty. Frankly, if you're saying let's be nicer to Nazis in this country, I'm gonna say, "Go fuck yourself. I'm not waiting for another Kristallnacht to call evil 'evil.' I'm gonna call Nazis "Nazis.'"

Fascist motherfuckers have the right to speak. They have a right to gather. They have a right to freely write any idiot hate they want. They can get their 88 tattoos all up and down their faces. And we have the right to raise our voices louder and in bigger numbers and tell them to shut the fuck up and go back to their holes in the ground like the piles of shit they are.

But we still want them to have health insurance.

8/16/2019

We're Not Gonna Do a Damn Thing About Guns

A memo of talking points for House Republicans makes plain that the GOP has no intention of doing a goddamn thing about guns. The document, obtained by the Tampa Bay Times, is one of those repellent but totally expected things that clearly define exactly how low these motherfuckers are.

It reads, in part, "White nationalism and racism are pure evil and cannot be tolerated in any form...We also can’t excuse violence from the left such as the El Paso shooter, the recent Colorado shooters, the Congressional baseball shooter, Congresswoman Giffords’ shooter and Antifa." Now, the "El Paso shooter" reference is wrong, according to a flak for some evil fuck of a congressman. They meant "Dayton shooter," although, generally, leftists don't keep a list of women they want to rape and people they want to kill.

Trying to contort the recent mass shootings into a "violence from the left" movement is pure bullshit. If nothing else, on the scale of murderous fuckery of the last couple of decades in the United States, the right pretty much tips the damn thing over. And we know, for a fact, that there has been an upsurge in violent yahoos proclaiming their violence in the name or in the shadow of Donald Trump. We know that white supremacists fucking love Trump and believe he has given them a wink and a nod at getting more shooty.

So, essentially, despite the niceties of declaring racism "pure evil," the GOP has decided to give white supremacists a pass on their violence while ginning up a fake leftist threat, which mostly consists of some tossed milkshakes and a couple of punches.

It's all because Republicans refuse to act on any kind of gun legislation, even that which is supported by two-thirds or more of the general public, including majorities of Republicans. Goddamn, how much of a pussy do you have to be in order to be cowed by an NRA that is falling the fuck apart?

As usual, Trump himself talked for a moment about background checks, but he quickly turned that around and now is going all-in on another bullshit approach to stopping mass shootings. As he told reporters yesterday, "I do want people to remember the words 'mental illness.'  These people are mentally ill and nobody talks about that.  But these are mentally ill people, and people have to start thinking about it. I think we have to start building institutions again because, you know, if you look at the ‘60s and ‘70s, so many of these institutions were closed.  And the people were just allowed to go onto the streets.  And that was a terrible thing for our country. "

A few things here. First, who doesn't remember the phrase "mental illness"? Motherfucker, we're reminded of that every day that you're president. Next, none of these fucking shooters were let out of the abusive, horrific mental institutions in the 1970s. And they weren't denied care during Reagan era. They're not 60 years old. 

Trump kept going on this point at his hell-rally last night in New Hampshire (aka "That other homogeneous state we have to pretend is more American than everywhere else every four years"). He slurred, "We are working very hard to make sure we keep guns out of the hands of insane people and those who are mentally sick and shouldn't have guns. But people have to remember, however, that there is a mental illness problem that has to be dealt with. It's not the gun that pulls the trigger. It's the person holding the gun."

I've said it before and I'll say it again: The gun has the trigger. No gun, no trigger. It doesn't matter who is around to pull it if there is no gun there.

He went on, "Even today, we're going to have to give major consideration to building new facilities for those in need. We have to do it. And at the same time, we will be taking mentally deranged and dangerous people off of the streets so we won't have to worry so much about that. It's a big problem. We don't have those institutions anymore and people can't get proper care."

Bitch, that's national health care. That's what he's calling for here. And if he wants to provide mental health care for all Americans, let's do that shit.

But he's not. He's just gonna get his prison industry buddies to build hellholes to lock up people and probably figure out a way to get some kickbacks from it.

Republicans need to be called "murder enablers." They are accomplices. And they will say anything and do nothing because they fear their own gun-toting base that they created. All these Dr. Frankensteins trying to appease their monsters.

8/14/2019

Trump Administration: The Huddled Masses Can Go Fuck Themselves

Let's get one thing straight here right off: If you are a legal immigrant in nearly every other country in the world, you are allowed to participate in that country's national health system. You're paying for the benefit through your taxes and other fees, and, goddamnit, just like everyone else legally in the country, you don't have to worry about paying much of anything else for your medical care. Nothing will be held against you. Nothing will turn you into a "public charge" or whatever fuckin' term for "undesirable" you want to use. And that's because most every other country in the world is not filled with ignorant savages who think that calling health care a "right" is akin to mass enslavement by socialists.

We in the United States happen to live in a country that is, in fact, filled with brutish idiots who would rather die in a ditch of a treatable disease than have a government-run health insurance system for everyone. So that means that only the poorest of the poor get to be on Medicaid, and then you're considered on welfare and a burden to the state. And that means that, unlike every other civilized nation, if you're a legal immigrant, the American government wants to hold it against you if you have a shitty job that doesn't provide health insurance (like, say, in a chicken processing plant) and need help so the flu doesn't financially ruin you.

We are a nation run by sadists who get off on hurting the poor. So, in the new rule, "Inadmissibility on Public Charge Grounds," published yesterday in the Federal Register, taking advantage of a whole bunch of government programs meant to, you know, help you survive could result in you getting booted from the country.

See, previously, "'public charge' has been interpreted to mean a person who is 'primarily dependent on the Government for subsistence, as demonstrated by either the receipt of public cash assistance for income maintenance or institutionalization for long-term care at Government expense.'" Yeah, we didn't take into consideration "an alien's reliance on or receipt of non-cash benefits such as the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP), or food stamps; Medicaid; and housing vouchers and other housing subsidies." 

But that was before motherfuckers took over and decided to redefine shit that didn't need redefining unless you are a motherfucker.  Here's the new shit: "DHS is revising its interpretation of 'public charge' to incorporate consideration of such benefits, and to better ensure that aliens subject to the public charge inadmissibility ground are self-sufficient, i.e., do not depend on public resources to meet their needs, but rather rely on their own capabilities, as well as the resources of family members, sponsors, and private organizations." Wow, sounds almost logical, no? Except it's just fucking cruel for so many reasons. Keep reading.

"This rule redefines the term 'public charge' to mean an alien who receives one or more designated public benefits for more than 12 months in the aggregate within any 36-month period (such that, for instance, receipt of two benefits in one month counts as two months). This rule defines the term 'public benefit' to include cash benefits for income maintenance, SNAP, most forms of Medicaid, Section 8 Housing Assistance under the Housing Choice Voucher (HCV) Program, Section 8 Project-Based Rental Assistance, and certain other forms of subsidized housing."

The fuckery is deep in this, but let's put this simply. Let's say you're an immigrant who has been in the country for a few years totally legally. All of a sudden., you lose your job when the restaurant where you're waiting tables or, hell, the office where you're working closes. For four months, you need to go on Medicaid, you need SNAP, and you need housing assistance. That's it. You can be denied a green card for circumstances completely beyond your control unless you starve, go homeless, and let yourself be sick.

This has been one of the pet projects of presidential adviser and man most likely piss in your swimming pool, Stephen Miller, whose head is essentially shaped like a white hood. It's racism that is so plain, it's almost laughable. Yes, let's punish those who want to come to the United States and work our shittiest jobs so rich pukes can get richer. Yes, let's make them pay sales taxes and other shit that prop up our economy. And by all fucking means, let's take the income taxes of people who may have paid them for years before needing some government assistance.

In the UK, if you are a legal immigrant, once you receive your National Insurance number, you have access to many (not all) financial benefits, starting with the National Health Service. You can apply for Employment and Support Allowance, in case you are too ill or disabled to work. You can apply for a Carer's Allowance if you are forced to stay home because you must care for someone. You can get housing credits, maternity leave pay, and retirement income. And it's specifically because you've been paying into the national insurance while living in the UK that you are eligible. In the United States, it doesn't matter how much you've paid. Go fuck yourself in your old country if you need Medicaid for over a year.

Of course, the demented dullards of the Trump administration are all on board. Acting director of U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services, that verminous cockscab Ken Cuccinelli, couldn't even fake it when he completely undercut the Emma Lazarus poem on the Statue of Liberty, ignoring the "huddled masses" and "wretched refuse" part. And then he insisted that the poem was about Europeans, which, really, just sodomize your ass with a burning cross at that point.

As for President Ignoramus Q. Shiteater, when asked about the rule and Cuccinelli yesterday, he said, " I don’t think it’s fair to have the American taxpayer paying for people to come into the United States...I am tired of seeing our taxpayer paying for people to come into the country and immediately go onto welfare and various other things.  So I think we’re doing it right." We should point out that not only are the taxpayers of the country paying for the months and months of vacation he has taken, but a good chunk of that taxpayer money is going straight into his business coffers and his own pockets.

Frankly, it's pretty fucking clear who should be booted from the country for being a public charge.

8/09/2019

We Are Led by Ghouls and Goons


Check out this pair of fucking ghouls, acting like they just stole a baby to drink its sweet, young blood so they can live on for a few precious days before they suck another child dry. What you're looking at is Donald Trump, a worn-out sack of lies painted orange and shoved into a terrible suit, and Melania Trump, a lamprey in human form, who happen to be the President and First Lady of the United States, smiling as they hold an orphan named Paul. 

Paul became an orphan because an immigrant-hating fuckworm decided to gun down people in an El Paso, Texas, Walmart. Paul's parents, Andre and Jordan Anchondo, died protecting Paul when the fuckworm opened fire. More specifically, his mother, Jordan, was protecting Paul, and Andre leapt in front of Jordan to protect her. When Jordan was shot dead, she fell on Paul, breaking some of his tiny fingers. He had been sent home after treatment. Well, not home, per se, because that doesn't really exist anymore, but sent with family. But when our First Couple of ghouls needed a prop for their visit to a hospital in El Paso and almost none of the victims there could or would act as that prop, Trump's goons called and asked if Paul could be brought back. 

There is something so fucked up about those smiles, something so empty and soulless, something chilling and depraved, that it should hurt us to our bones to see it. The failure to act humble in the face of pain, pain that was caused in part by Trump's own words and actions, echoed in the fuckworm's 8chan post, is galling. And Trump's pathetic thumbs-up may as well just be a middle finger. They don't care, at least not in the sense that we generally think of empathy. They care about how they are perceived, yes, but they don't care about Paul or any of the dead or dying or wounded.  They are our American void, the abyss we have earned, the black hole that we have come to deserve. 

Halfway across the country, just before Trump bragged about how his El Paso crowd size was bigger than Beto's to hospital staff who had been putting people back together, 600 Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents had surrounded chicken processing plants in several small Mississippi towns and then arrested 680 workers for "not having proper documentation to be in the United States." 

You ever spoken to anyone who works in a chicken processing plant? Or worked there yourself?  It's a fucking nightmare of slaughter and blood and guts. It is horrible, hard work. Jesus, just imagine the noise you must deal with. 

After traumatizing the children of the workers, who had just started their school year, ICE ended up releasing 300 of the people they had taken into custody who had kids waiting for them. The parents  promised that they would return for their immigration hearings. You got that? You understand that? It was literally catch and release. And while ICE claims they were always cognizant of ensuring that the mostly American children of undocumented workers were taken care of, you can fucking well bet that it wasn't until video of sobbing, pleading kids got onto the news that anything was done.

And what did our emotionally and morally vacant president say about this today? "I want people to know that if they come into the United States illegally, they’re getting out; they’re going to be brought out.  And this serves as a very good deterrent...when people see what they saw yesterday, and like they will see for a long time, they know that they’re not staying here." What a baldly inhuman statement, essentially saying that it's good to see children sobbing because...fuck it. I just don't want to tease that out. Fuck him.

The saddest part is how many of Trump's taint-licking supporters think he's right. "Hey, if those parents didn't want their kids to suffer, they shouldn't have been here illegally," they say, as if the decision to come here was made on a whim, as if they hadn't faced extraordinary suffering and deprivation in order to take a goddamn chance and work in one of the worst fucking jobs in the nation.  Trump is a leader of monsters.

But the only funny part of this is that the raid, where no Americans who hired the undocumented workers were touched and no executives who want this cheap labor force were rounded up and driven away, is going to hurt the bottom line of the companies to the tune of millions because, well, fuck, ICE just took away a shitload of their employees. One of the plants was partially shut down today because of a lack of workers. That's what your donations to Trump got you, motherfuckers.

It's not just that cruelty is the point, as we say all the time since Adam Serwer coined that phrase. It's also that, given the chance to even pretend not to be cruel, Trump will shove that aside, as if anything but cruelty is weakness. The orange ghoul in the White House will not soften for your dead; he will not bend for your children's pain. 

8/07/2019

This Desperate, Armed Land

One afternoon in Barcelona last week, I walked back to the small apartment building where I was staying to find two police officers waiting for the elevator. The elevator was tiny and could only fit one person at a time, so one cop went up while her partner waited to take the next one. I asked the remaining officer if everything was okay, hoping he spoke some English as my Spanish is pretty much nonexistent. 

"Yes, it's fine. Someone had some things stolen," he said in better English than most Americans. "It happens all the time here." He asked where I was from and I told him, and that prompted him to say, "Oh, it's not like the United States here. We have pickpockets and some robberies. But no one is shooting people." While he was underselling crime overall in the city, he was absolutely right on that last point. No one worries about being shot for going to a festival or a Walmart or a club or a school or anywhere, really. Barcelona has over 1.6 million people with millions of tourists visiting. There were 10 murders last year.

In the ten days I was out of the United States, there were three mass shootings: Gilroy, El Paso, and Dayton. In Spain, the murder rate is about 0.6 per 100,000 people. In the United States, it's currently  at around 5 per 100,000.  So the US has 8-9 times the murder rate of Spain, which isn't even the lowest in Europe. If you visit Italy or the Czech Republic, you could write this about how they are even safer when it comes to murder. 

Other countries have mentally-ill people. Other countries have young people who play violent, first-person shooter video games. Other countries have racists and fascists and white supremacists who shit-post on online message boards. What these countries don't have is the staggering number of guns that we have in the United States. They don't have the ludicrous availability of weapons originally designed for war. And thus they almost never have a mass shooting, despite the presence of mental illness, violent video games, and the ineluctable array of assholes.

When our savage lump of a president undulated over to the microphone on Monday to give a flat, forced, utterly false speech about the two massacres in 24 hours, he absolutely refused, as ever, to place any blame on the out of control gun lobby and manufacturers and sellers. And owners. In that slurred, trash-Muppet voice of his, squinting as if light from the teleprompter would melt his eyeballs, Donald Trump blurbled blame at video games and "a culture that celebrates violence." 

It should be noted here that right after the Dayton shooting, Trump praised an MMA fighter and wished him luck. It should also be noted that Trump participated in WWE events and was a regular in attendance at boxing matches, with promoter/criminal Don King as one of his "friends." In other words, (mostly) real violence occurred for his entertainment and somehow that's more noble than pretend-shooting enemy soldiers and hell beasts. This is not to mention his threats of violence against protesters at his rallies, his musing on nuking Afghanistan and North Korea, and every filthy fucking word out of his shit-filled mouth that degrades immigrants and non-whites.

He also said, "[W]e must reform our mental health laws to better identify mentally disturbed individuals who may commit acts of violence and make sure those people not only get treatment, but, when necessary, involuntary confinement.  Mental illness and hatred pulls the trigger, not the gun." Except that the gun provides the trigger. No gun, no trigger. Also, if you're going to assert that people should get treatment, then the government ought to offer medical care to those diagnosed "mentally disturbed."

And let's talk for just a moment about that idea that these mass murderers must be mentally ill. I read the "manifesto" or "screed" or "decent sophomore-level college essay" by the El Paso shooter, as I've read the words of just about every one of these shits. Inasmuch as we all pretend we can distance diagnose someone through their writings, this one was not written in any kind of state of mental breakdown. It was a calm argument on various points, like he had just gotten a class assignment on racist murder.

Calling mass shooters "crazy" for committing the shooting may be comforting because it makes them Not Like Me, but it's a lie. It degrades the real sufferers of mental illness, and it demonizes them. It places the blame at arm's length and gives every NRA-owned politician an out. This is much the same as Trump's offer to discuss even weak gun control measures in the context of immigration reform. It blames the wrong thing and the wrong people. Immigrants aren't what ail the country.

Simply put, the special sickness in the United States is the guns. The majority of Americans know that. I'd venture that the majority of politicians know it. But the Republican has a stake in keeping its voters stoked with paranoia about outsiders, about any government programs, about their own neighbors who aren't like them. The GOP needs its base to be desperate and then to exploit that desperation in order to maintain power. But the desperate need to have something that gives them comfort, that makes them feel safe in a world that they are constantly told by their leaders and their media is out to destroy them and their fading way of life. Guns provide that security. No, they may not have health care, access to a good education, a fair wage at a fair job, or decent infrastructure, but, goddamnit, they can have guns and the belief that it inoculates them should shit go south. Or if they believe it's finally go time to act on whatever belief is driving them, never realizing that the people who sold them this bill of goods are the real enemy.

In his statement after El Paso and Dayton, former president Barack Obama made guns the very first point: "First, no other nation on Earth comes close to experiencing the frequency of mass shootings that we see in the United States. No other developed nation tolerates the levels of gun violence that we do."  Yeah, he said, there are these other factors (not violent video games because that's just stupid).  But as any law enforcement officer will tell you, you have to disarm someone or render them no longer dangerous before you can do anything else for them.

Of course, Trump, who is the king of misdirected grievance and thus the ideal leader for the desperate and armed, only saw that Obama said, "We should soundly reject language coming out of the mouths of any of our leaders that feeds a climate of fear and hatred or normalizes racist sentiments," and made the whole thing about himself and unwittingly admitting he uses that very language. Then he started tweeting about how the Dayton shooter had leftist leanings and that people should stop blaming him and Beto O'Rourke sucks. The guns may be the sickness. Trump is the parasite that feeds on the ill.

8/02/2019

Guest Post: The Four Politicians Who Really Need to Go Back to Where They Came From (Part 2)

(Continuing R. Sharp's post from yesterday. He's getting a bunch of shit off his chest, so just kick back and enjoy the ride. Yesterday, he went after Trump and McConnell. Here are his other two politicians who we should send back to some goddamn place.)

Good riddance to Paul Ryan, that spineless piece of trash. My only wish was that he had been voted out instead of comfortably retiring. Here’s the thing though: Paul Ryan might be out of politics, but his actions in and on his way out of office prove that this motherfucker doesn’t give a shit about America or anything that can’t make him filthy rich. Not only did he enable Candidate Trump and work with him to get him elected, he knew a possible President Cheeto would be a complete disaster. He could smell Trump from a mile away (it's true - this is a proven fact about Trump), and he did nothing to stop him. In fact, he worked with Trump and assimilated him into the Republican Party’s decadent framework.

Sadly, Ryan isn’t a complete idiot. He planned his moves very carefully. He saw the results of the 2016 election as an escape hatch from American politics. When his disastrous American Healthcare Act failed in the Senate, Ryan knew he was on his way out. But before he retired, he promoted Trump’s cruel immigration policies and actively supported Republican candidates before the 2018 midterms. What really pisses me off about Ryan was his final act in Congress. In late 2018, Ryan pushed for thousands of unused work visas to be used for Irish citizens who wanted to emigrate to the United States. Yeah. After years spent blocking comprehensive immigration reform, Ryan decided he would hand out visas to white people who shared his heritage, but he even failed at that since it was blocked by a Republican, Tom Cotton, in the Senate. The final shiv from his own party. Ryan helped build the horrifying America we see today. Then he retired and left his mess all over the place for others to clean. If Ryan loves Ireland so much maybe he should go back. He clearly doesn’t give a damn about the United States.

Finally, the last deplorable prick on the list is an oldie by Trump administration standards. You may remember John F. (Fucking Asshole) Kelly as Trump’s chief of staff starting in mid-2017 and through 2018. You probably recall his hardline stance on immigration and his oversight on the implementation of the zero-tolerance policy at the southern border. Kelly pushed policies that led to thousands of Central American children being detained at the border in facilities run by government contractors. We’ve all read the stories and seen the news. These places are essentially prison camps where children have no access to basic hygiene products, are regularly abused and neglected, and have been indefinitely separated from their parents. If Kelly’s support for these facilities wasn’t bad enough, wait until you hear what he’s been doing since leaving the White House.

Kelly is currently on the board of Caliburn International, the parent organization of the company that runs the largest facility housing migrant children in the United States. He actively pushed for family separation and throwing innocent children into prison camps, and when he left the White House he saw an opening to make money on other people’s suffering. But this is only part of the reason why Kelly sucks so much. You see, Kelly is a military man. He served as a four star general in the Persian Gulf War, Operation Desert Storm, and the Iraq War. He’s been to countries where children and their parents live in squalor with absolutely nothing but the clothes on their backs. He fought to end oppression in these regions. He fought to uphold American ideals. But that all seemed to change when he entered the White House. Kelly is making money off practices that are totally un-American, and that’s simply because he doesn’t care. He’d rather see children mistreated and live in their own shit than fight for what’s right. Just as long as he gets a fat paycheck at the end of the week.

There you have it. Throw these four fuckers out of the country. Chant "Send them back" at them, but, of course, Trump voters are too high on their racist fumes to know who the real enemies of the state are.

8/01/2019

Guest Post: The Four Politicians Who Really Need to Go Back to Where They Came From (Part 1)

(Another post from the Rude Pundit's designated millennial guest blogger, R. Sharp. His views do not necessarily reflect the views of all millennials because that would be fucking dumb.)

So, two weeks ago that bloated, white supremacist  king of idiots told four congresswomen of color - Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Ilhan Omar, Ayanna Pressley, and Rashida Tlaib - to go back to where they came from and accused them of hating their own country. Not surprising whatsoever considering President Dipshit has been plunging America into the kind of stink-filled swamp he said he would drain in the first place. I’m not even fazed by whatever atrocious thing he says or does. Everything just provides extra motivation for me to vote him and all of his taint-licking enablers out in 2020. Not only has this been the most ineffective and cruel administration in modern American politics, it’s also boasted an impressive collection of morons. It takes a special kind of mental deficiency to tell four Congresswoman to go back to where they came from when three of them were born in the fucking United States and one is a naturalized citizen. Much like that play-wife Melania.

Here are the first two of four people who actually hate what America stands for.

First, of course, there's Trump. The grotesque orange monster doesn’t care about anybody except for himself (and Ivanka, but only after she’s done lubing his cashew dick to a shine). He relishes pulling America down into this divisive shit storm, because it distracts us from what’s really going on. Think about it: he attacks Amazon and other companies as their stock drowns. Here's my theory: He starts a trade war with China and the market falls. In the background, he has his shills buy up stock for him. He changes his mind, market shares rise again, and there you have it. He’s supposedly made billions. All he cares about is money, but we live in a capitalist dystopia now and things like this should just be expected. Frankly, that just scratches the surface of his hatred for America.

What ticks me off about him and his goddamned Republican henchman is that they pay excessive lip service to the integrity of our democracy. But, they’ve taken every active step to chip away at it. From election security to voter suppression, Republicans have known for a long time they can’t win the popular vote. They need the Electoral College or the Supreme Court, or to enlist aid from a hostile foreign government. Republicans will stop at nothing to ensure that their enraged clementine will remain in power. America was built on the idea that we didn’t bow down to kings and dictators who employ these exact tactics to weaken the foundations of our democracy. Trump is by far the most un-American president we’ve ever had. He will drag this country into oblivion as long as he can see dollar signs at the end.

Obviously, Mitch McConnell is by far the most damaging member of the Republican-controlled Senate that’s been reaming our asses since 2011. He recently said that he’d be delighted to be called the “grim reaper for progressive policies,” which include such Communist nightmares like addressing climate change, ensuring millions have adequate healthcare, and making the top 1% pay their fair share of taxes. What he’s basically saying is, “As long as I’m taken care of, I could give two shits about the rest of you plebes. Now please, keep voting for me and my horrible motherfuckers.” If ensuring the peace of mind of lobbyists and politicians while casting the public aside isn’t awful enough, there's his whiny bitch approach to Russian election interference.

Moscow Mitch doesn’t like when he gets called out for being a Russian asset. We know that President Obama approached Comrade McConnell in 2016 and wanted to launch a bi-partisan rebuke against potential Russian election interference. Mitch curled up into his shell and refused to do such a thing. God forbid the Senate Majority Leader ensure our democracy remains strong and secure. Hell, there were Senate elections involved. I mean it’s not like he took an oath to “defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic,” or anything, right? Moscow Mitch is a liar and a traitor. He would gladly hand his balls over to Putin to ensure Trump a second term. 

(Tomorrow: The other two Republicans who can get the fuck out of here.)

7/30/2019

On Vacation, Boss

So, yeah, I'm far away in Spain. Barcelona, to be precise, on a much-needed escape from the intense fuckery of the Trump administration. It's a goddamn paradise on that account. Unlike the UK, I haven't seen a single piece of protest art (or, and this is entirely unlikely at all, supportive art) mentioning or picturing our dumb motherfucker of a president. Nothing. No graffiti. No signs. No posters. Not a goddamned word stenciled anywhere.

You got that, Donald Trump? Nobody fucking thinks about you here. Nobody fucking cares about you. They have other shit to do and worry about, like Catalan independence and that kind of shit.

Anyways, I'll be back in a week or so after working my way through all of Seven Deadly Sins between here and Valencia. Except maybe Wrath, although perhaps this counts.

There will be a guest post or two. So look out for them. And be nice to each other while I'm away. Replace the weed you smoke. Don't worry about the whiskey. And smoke nasty-ass cigarettes out on balcony.

7/25/2019

Profiles in Cowardice: Random Observations on the Mueller Hearings

Yesterday's congressional hearings with former Special Counsel Robert Mueller revealed the profound cowardice at the heart of our nation's leaders right now in dealing with Donald Trump (himself a coward of the lowest order) and the crimes that he has so blatantly committed and continues to commit on a daily basis. Anyone who has actually read Mueller's report or paid attention during the hearing who doesn't believe that Russia interfered with the 2016 election and that Trump panicked and attempted to cover up any involvement would have to be a genuine fool or a willful idiot. The report says that Trump did so. It just doesn't say that he committed a crime, although it walks right up to that.

There was some hope that the hearings before the House Judiciary and Intelligence Committees would produce a crystallizing moment, a "gotcha," an absolutely clear statement of Trump and his circle's complicity in obstruction of justice. Democrats called the hearing ostensibly to disseminate the information in the report, but you know that they wanted Mueller to say that Trump should have been indicted but was blocked by Attorney General and the man who put the "toad" in toady, William Barr.

If that had happened, no one would be talking about Mueller's really painful, halting, obviously impaired appearance. But the cowardly media was not entertained and thus declared the day a failure. Jesus, no one should care about the verve with which revelations of our compromised electoral system were delivered. No one should care if the person telling us that the President induced people to lie about their involvement in compromising our electoral system is particularly charming. But we don't live in a country where plain facts matter anymore, and we don't have a media that is capable of explaining facts (yeah, yeah, there are exceptions).

That sky opening moment didn't happen. And, instead, we were treated to the display of Democrats trying to get as much of the report on record as possible, with Mueller agreeing that, yes, what he wrote in the report is what he wrote in the report, and that it is as enraging and worrisome as it ever was. There were a couple of important moments that may make fine ads, like Rep. Jerrold Nadler's direct, quick questioning that demonstrated just how much Trump is lying about the report. Adam Schiff's opening comments were brutal, as was his masterful dialogue with Mueller that was a distillation of just how much Russia helped Trump and how much Trump and his team welcomed that help and how really scary that all is.

Republicans on the committee were, with one, perhaps two, exceptions, a miserable bunch of cowardly bastards. Bowing down before their twin idols, Trump and the right-wing media machine, they regurgitated every rank conspiracy theory, vomiting up a litany of names and a series of lies about the origins of the investigation and the investigators themselves, all to create a viscous fog for their president's venality and immorality and criminality. From loathsome hick Louie Gohmert screeching like he got his penis stuck in the donkey he was fucking to bloated sack of farts James Sensenbrenner declaring Mueller's work a flaming sack of shit left on the government's porch to dimwitted Michael Turner bludgeoning the word "exonerate" to death. It was disgusting, watching asshole after asshole proclaim the innocence of Trump while trying, at least on some minor level, to pretend to give even a single fuck about Russia's interference in our elections. How low does a man or woman have to be to fear a nasty comment by Tucker Carlson? How quickly do they become traitors because they fear tweets that call for their ouster or deaths? What vermin they are and what worms are the people who elect them.

Despite all the tributes to his long career as GI Joe G-Man, Mueller came across as a coward, too. Simply put, there was no reason for him to hedge on what he believed. As Sarah Kendzior put it, "Throughout the hearings, Mr. Mueller acted as if outside forces constrained his ability to answer questions. But he is no longer an employee of the Department of Justice, and they can no longer tell him what to say." It made no sense, for instance, that he was so clearly incensed by the idea of Russia's attack on the 2016 election, yet he would not say, clearly, that Donald Trump is harming the country by dismissing that idea. That's pretty easy: Here is something that's broken. If you don't fix it, it will get worse. Therefore, if the person who is supposed to fix it doesn't, that person wants things to get worse. But he decided to limit himself and play the good Republican, the good conservative, one of the many useful idiots who think that the System still functions as it's supposed to. And just say, for chrissake, that anyone would have arrested Trump. All this coy implication was worthless. For someone who once stood up to rabid buffalo Dick Cheney, it was a dereliction of duty and a failure of nerve that will ultimately damage the nation.

Yet as strong as the Democrats in the committees were with their questioning - there was blissfully little speechifying - the press conference after the hearings demonstrated the cowardice that has plagued the party's leaders since Trump was elected. When Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi again squashed the idea that impeachment of Trump should move forward, she undid everything that the hearings might have done. Impeachment would force attention to be paid to what Trump has done and his failure to act on what was done to us. Now, they say, they want to wait until courts decide on whether or not Trump needs to give over documents or allow people to testify. C'mon.  It's as if Pelosi and others in the Democratic caucus, ignoring a growing faction of members who want impeachment, believe that Trump won't be re-elected and things can go back to whatever illusion of normal they think it was before. This is the Merrick Garland fallacy: don't get in the mud to fight it out because we're obviously gonna win the presidency. How did that turn out in 2016? Democrats are stating that Trump committed crimes. Hell, Nadler used the phrase "high crimes and misdemeanors" the other day. If you say that and refuse to impeach, then Republicans have nothing to fear from you and will keep owning the story with their lies.

As he revealed in his ranting, frothing moment with the press yesterday, Donald Trump is a danger to the nation, and he believes he is empowered to do more and more. That neither Democrats nor Republicans are willing to stand up to him in the firmest, most obvious way available is the kind of cowardice that will damn us, and we'll deserve it.

7/23/2019

Impeachment Is Not Just About Mueller

Unless something extraordinary and unexpected happens at these hearings, like that former Special Counsel Robert Mueller actually answers the question about whether or not Donald Trump would have been indicted had he not been president, then the Democrats have already fucked up by placing so much emphasis on what the Mueller Report told us about Trump's behavior. Yeah, it's true that the report pretty much says that Trump obstructed justice in the investigation and that some hinky shit was going on with Russia, but, fuck, that's complicated and it doesn't involve blow jobs, so most people don't even want to understand.

Mostly, though, you can count on Mueller constantly referring to the report as Democrats try to get something out of him and Republicans yell at him about nutzoid conspiracies. (For the record, I think it's bullshit cowardice and a dereliction of duty that Mueller hasn't said, "Yeah, I'd've arrested the motherfucker if I could have.")

Democrats in Congress have made a strategic error in not making Trump's gross racism and sexism a centerpiece in a concerted attack on him. And it's a goddamn tragedy the way that credible allegations of rape and other sexual assault and misbehavior have been pretty much ignored. And that's all incredibly frustrating and outright enraging because there is more than enough to impeach without Mueller, but by hyping first the report and now Mueller's appearance before congressional committees, Democrats have given themselves very little wiggle room and little time to build a case for impeachment on everything (and I mean fucking everything, from emoluments to misuse of intelligence to disrespect of Congress to incompetence to being a danger to the nation) else. Donald Trump isn't a politician who fucked around with an investigation to stay in power. He's an entirely corrupt entity, a spreading cancer, a hatemongering beast who needs to be ejected from the body politic in the firmest, angriest legal way possible.

In an amazing thread on Twitter, author and former political consultant Tim Wise lays out why it's horseshit that Democrats are trying to fight Trump on policy grounds. Wise was a staffer for a PAC that opposed David Duke in both his statewide runs, for Senate and governor, in Louisiana, and he saw how bothering to argue tax policy with Duke made the white supremacist part of things so normal.  As Wise puts it, "It allowed people to say 'well if he's really this racist, white supremacist, why are they talking about all this other stuff?'" The same goes for Trump's indecencies.

Every fucking day should be a barrage of Democrats saying that they refuse to work with a racist and an accused rapist who pals around with child rapists (and, yeah, may be a child rapists himself). That's how you don't normalize this shit. Don't dignify him. Don't meet with him. Don't attend his events. Don't act nice and polite. Fuck him up.

And start the goddamned impeachment hearings because he's a racist and an accused rapist. For fuck's sake, we have a tape now of him literally grabbing a woman and patting her ass where no consent at all is involved. This ain't a bunch of conspiracy theories. It's the actual words and actions of the president, both now and in the past.

Every Democratic debate should be how fucking pathetic it is that greedy, shitty Republicans defend a a racist and an accused rapist who pals around with child rapists. Notice how you don't even have to mention Russia or obstruction of justice or Mueller. And no one can accuse you of socialism because, well, fuck, it's not even in the mix.

Yes, Democrats have botched the hell out of all of this, except, you know, the Squad and a few others, but they are working in a vacuum without leadership behind them. Democratic leaders have botched the reaction to the Mueller Report, they have botched all the revelations about Trump, they have botched it all in favor of some forgotten notion of comity, some false belief in the power of policy.

It's as if Democrats still believe that they can convince white racists to give up their racism for Medicare-for-all and free college. You really think voters in Kentucky are gonna give two shits that thousands and thousands of people will lose their health care if Republicans succeed killing the Affordable Care Act? They sure didn't in 2016.

So the Mueller hearings will happen and we might learn something, but more than likely we won't, and because Democrats fumbled the initial spin, it'll have no effect on public opinion. But they can still get things going on all the other fronts in the mistake that is the presidency of Donald Trump. Jesus fuck, the man ranted and lied to a bunch of teenagers today about "illegal immigrants" and voter fraud: "You got people voting that shouldn’t be voting. They vote many times, not just twice, not just three times.  They vote — it’s like a circle.  They come back; they put a new hat on.  They come back; they put a new shirt.  And in many cases, they don’t even do that." He is a fucking animal, a fucking plague dog, and he needs to be dealt with as such. That motherfucker won't let you pet him if you put your hand out gently. He'll bite the shit out of you while pissing on your shoes and then lunge at your throat.

I'm shitting all over Democrats here, but the real villains are, of course, Republicans, who have let Trump get away with all of it, who created the circumstances for Trump to be president, who are complicit in every crime, in every immoral act, in every ass-fucking of tradition and ethics, in every tearing up of the Constitution. They must be driven out of politics, and you're not gonna do that by debating Trump on trade with China. You do that by getting a majority of Americans frothing and outraged and revolted at the idea of Trump as a human being. It really shouldn't be this hard.

This is life and death. If that's not clear by now, then all the time in the world with Mueller ain't gonna change it.

7/19/2019

...So We Have to Save Ourselves (Part 2)

Last week, I wrote that the opposition to Donald Trump and his supporters, apostles, and enablers needs to get its head around the idea that no one person or thing is going to save us from Trumpism. Not the Mueller Report, not a secret cabal of intelligence agents (hell, I guess you could call it the "Deep State"), not the hidden child-fucking files of Jeffrey Epstein. And, as if on cue, the U.S. Attorney of the Southern District of New York released a statement that it was ending its investigation into the hush money payments made to Stormy Daniels by Michael Cohen under the direction of Donald Trump without indicting anyone else. As the conservative toxic waste dump RedState crowed, "The SDNY Just Crushed One Of The Left’s Biggest Dreams," which was that the honorable, dogged New York office would bring down Trump. Except everyone kind of forgot that the U.S. Attorney works for the Justice Department, which is under the Attorney General, who is William Barr, who is a lawless sow fucker. So now we've moved on to the next dream, that something something Mueller hearing something something will happen.

Except it won't. And the House still won't open an impeachment inquiry, not even after this past week's descent into racist nationalism.

So we have to figure out how to save ourselves from the fascistic threat of Trumpism, in ways that make real change and in ways that demonstrate to those in power that they are facing a greater wave of people than the human hemorrhoids in the chanting MAGA crowds. We have to face the fact that there is a political race war that needs to happen, and it's time to get the troops ready for battle.

I have two suggestions. Neither of them is particularly new (hell, I've talked about one of 'em before), but place them into the new, urgent context in which we find ourselves.

First, fuck the white working class. Fuck Trump voters.  Fuck their votes. Fuck their beliefs. Fuck everything about them. Democrats and the left attempting to appeal to Trump supporters, as if better angels exist in their cesspool, is like a wounded gazelle attempting to reason with hyenas. They're gonna eat you; you just look like an idiot for thinking you could convince them otherwise.

The emphasis for the 2020 election has to be on those who didn't vote in 2016 and 2018.  This ain't about voter enthusiasm. Jesus, if anti-Trump voters aren't fired up, then Democrats should just go beat off in a corner for the duration.  Voter registration has to be the top priority, especially in targeting non-white people of voting age. (Remember: We're in a political race war.) Republicans have a massive effort under way to get more voters. Right now,  there are lower-key efforts, like Jesse Jackson and his Rainbow PUSH organization trying to register 100,000 new voters in South Carolina.

Sure, there are great local movements, like Metropolitan Organizing Strategy Enabling Strength in Michigan.  But MOSES and other organizations aside, we need to have a national effort, perhaps led by groups with a national status, like Indivisible or Swing Left, which actually has a voter registration strategy but needs some big time boosting. We need to head to the swing states and find the voters who have sat out. And we need lots of volunteers who are willing to help people negotiate the bullshit, byzantine new voter laws in those states.

The other suggestion is way more radical and way more dangerous from a messaging position: a general strike, with the kinds of protests we're seeing in Hong Kong and (closer to home) Puerto Rico. As Will Bunch put it last year, "A general strike or even massive protests are well outside of the normal comfort zone for a majority of Americans. But the question we need to ask ourselves is this... how comfortable are we with Donald Trump spending even one more night in the White House?"

A general strike can bring together liberal causes across the board, from Black Lives Matter to the Women's March to gun laws to immigration reform to the climate crisis and more. And it strikes at the heart of the capitalist enterprise in a way that a well-ordered, well-permitted protest march never can. Right now, we have a government that is unresponsive to what the vast majority of Americans want. Our fucked up electoral system means that not only can a president win without a majority of the popular vote, the House and Senate can be controlled by a party that didn't receive the most votes.  So the voice of the people needs to made front and center again because our alleged representative democracy isn't representing us in a fair, realistic way.

The protests in Hong Kong were particularly stunning because it was essentially a movement without a central leader. Instead, a coalition of pro-democracy groups worked together, with several members, like Bonnie Leung and Jimmy Sham, taking on different roles in getting the message out there and getting the people in the streets. The progressive movement in the United States has that same kind of possibility of coalition with conveners providing guidance and direction. Of course, it's something that would need community support as people missed work for what might be a lengthy strike with a goal of forcing the resignation of Trump and his administration.

It's a pie in the sky idea, yeah, I know. There's a good chance that it would fall apart quickly, faced with a public that doesn't want to hang in there, with a media that might be dismissive and, in the case of Fox "news," derisive, with an apathetic lump of shit in the White House going golfing during the whole thing, with corporate and business leaders and Republicans declaring it a "socialist revolution" or some such shit.

Yeah, the good guys might not win, but even when they fail, at least they can say they gave it a shot. At least they found some way to find meaning and community in a time of cruelty and division. At least they laid a foundation for some future action.

Or we can all go back to where we came from.

7/17/2019

Let's Have This Goddamn Political Race War Already

At least now Democrats can stop fucking pretending that there is any reasoning with Republicans or anyone on the right at this point. By refusing to condemn President Donald Trump's blatantly racist statements as "racist," by continuing and expanding on Trump's attacks on four non-white Democratic congresswomen in saying that they should leave the United States, by getting outraged that racism is being called racism, the GOP has ripped its mask off in the clearest way possible and gone all in on attacks on non-whites. At this point, Donald Trump could yell, "Nigger!" on Fifth Avenue and wouldn't lose any voters. And Republicans would blame whichever black person it was directed at.

Conservatives like to decry what they say is "identity politics;" that is, making policies and running candidates to appeal to a certain racial, ethnic, religious, or other background. But the GOP's appeal to white nationalists and to the idiot hordes that comprise its base is more clearly identity politics than anything Democrats have done. 'Cause, see, Trump and those who suckle at Trump's orange manteats get their votes almost exclusively from white people. By contrast, Ilhan Omar was elected with 78% of the vote in a district that is two-thirds white. I fucking guarantee you that Republican Representative Steve Scalise didn't get shit for non-white votes. But we're supposed to pretend that Omar is dividing Americans. Fuck that.

The right has been aching for a political race war. With their explicit support of Trump's "Go back to your country," now supposedly not racist "If you're not happy here, you can leave," as well as rallying around demonizing Omar, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Ayanna Pressley, and Rashid Tlaib, Republicans have tied their 2020 strategy to this racist fuckery. The four progressives are the new welfare queen, the new Willie Horton, the new Mexican rapists. And they are folding that into the oldest fucking act in the conservative book: calling Democrats socialist or "commies," as a sweaty Lindsey Graham did. There's the campaign: commies and coloreds. They really did make it 1960 again.

Hell, yesterday, Trump went back to his political origin of saying that other countries send their criminals here to seek asylum. In a cabinet meeting, while doing the supposedly official business of the supposed United States, Trump said, "Why would Honduras or Guatemala or El Salvador, why would they keep their criminals when you can put them into the caravan, lose them in a caravan, and send them up to the United States. We take everybody because the Democrats don’t allow immigration laws that mean anything. It’s horrible. It’s horrible."

As a counterpoint, here's how a mother from Honduras described the circumstances that forced them to leave their home: "The family fled Honduras after Tania witnessed her mother get killed. Her sister-in-law also was a witness and was later kidnapped, tortured and slain to keep her from testifying. The gang MS-13 then posted a note on the family's door telling them they had 45 minutes to leave, Tania said. That's when the family left to seek asylum in the U.S." Yeah, it is horrible. Just not in the way our simpering racist prick of a president says it is. And his very approach, his very words are more anti-American than a million socialist candidates demanding that this nation take care of its people like nearly every other nation on earth.

Let me personalize this: I fucking love my neighborhood. I love the black women artists who live downstairs from me. I love the Latino kids who ride their bikes up and down the street with rap music on old school boomboxes playing. I love the Indian family across the street who have a disabled son whose Chinese bus driver is always overjoyed to see. I love the Dominican family behind me who have parties that always end up with musicians playing amazing tunes. I love the young Puerto Rican parents who have a car with a license frame that says, "My other car is the Tardis." I love the white people who showed up to offer comfort to the Pakistani owner of the corner bodega when his father died. It ain't perfect. We've had crime and fights and everything (although that's changed since the neighborhood has become even more diverse). But I fucking love this America. I don't know who is here legally or illegally. And I don't give a shit. I just care that we all treat each other with respect. If you don't love this, too, then you don't love this country.

That's worth fighting for. That's worth pissing off the mythical "White Working Class" (which doesn't seem to contain all those working class voters who think Trump's full of shit). That's worth having the political race war the GOP has been aching to have and has been having since 1980. Let's have this throwdown the nation has needed since the civil rights era. Let's define who we are and try to finally be absolutely fucking clear about it.

Call it like many of us have been saying for years now: If you support Donald Trump, you're racist. And fuck you. Double fuck you if you think calling you "racist" is racist, you dumb motherfuckers. And triple fuck you if you think anyone who doesn't want to get face-fucked by Donald Trump hates this country and should leave. You assholes aren't leaving over the Affordable Care Act, which is the law of the land. You assholes didn't leave over same-sex marriage. You put on your asshole hats and tried to change it. Which is the exact same thing that Ocasio-Cortez, Omar, Pressley, and Tlaib are trying to do (minus the asshole hats and with smarter tweets).

Make this election explicitly about the meaning of America, Democrats. This is our chance to take the plot of this story back from Republicans, who have controlled the narrative for most of the last three generations. Do we stand with diversity as our strength or do we stand with white nationalism? Do we stand with the right to dissent or obeisance to a leader? Jesus, we already have to get over the bar of our current racism. If it turns out that most of the country wants to be more racist and more in the thrall of a fucking moron and his moronic policies and the moronic, racist party that props up his saggy orange ass, then we'll at least be able to be fucking honest about it.

And then we can decide if fighting on is worth it or if we want to leave.

(Note: This was supposed to be part 2 of something I started last week, but, well, then this shit started. It's coming.)

7/12/2019

At His Nutzoid Summit, Trump Admits He Stares at Twitter Instead of Working

Yesterday, Donald Trump, who I occasionally feel nauseated remembering is still the president of the United States, hosted what was billed as a Social Media Summit at the White House. What really happened is that Trump invited a range of conservative idiots, inveterate assholes, festering fucknuts, conspiracy crazies, and Charlie Kirk to sit around and tell Trump how awesome he is while he reciprocated and then whined about them being censored. It was like when you go visit your grandpa and he's invited all his old racist friends over. Actually, it wasn't "like that." It pretty much was that, with the added bonus of villainous walrus Sebastian Gorka going apeshit on reporters.

Honestly, if intelligence could create energy, the vortex from the absence of it would have swallowed the Rose Garden.

In his completely insane remarks after the summit, where, one presumes, Trump walked around with his dick out and asked each of them to yank, telling them, "One of you is getting a special surprise" as circus music played and a shirtless Mick Mulvaney cackled in the corner as he pinched his nipples bloody, Trump completely missed the point of the "free" part of "free speech," saying, "Free speech is not when you see something good, and then you purposely write bad. To me, that’s very dangerous speech, and you become angry at it. But that’s not free speech." Freedom, to Trump, means free to agree with him.

But the main focus of his wayward ire was what he believes is censorship on Twitter and other social media platforms. See, sometimes he doesn't get as many likes and retweets as he thinks he should get. Trump said, no, really, "We got a lot of people. Way, way over 100 million, but I used to pick them up… And when I say 'used to,' I’m talking about a few months ago. I was picking them up, a hundred thousand people every, very short period of time. Now, it’s, I would say, ten times as long. And I notice things happening when I put out something—a good one, that people like, right? Good tweet. It goes up. It used to go up, it would say 7,000, 7,008, 7,000, 7,017, 7,024, 7,032, 7,044. Right? Now it goes, 7,000, 7,008, 6,998. Then they go, 7,009, 6,074." The audience of lepers and whores and leper whores booed the injustice of people undoing their "like."

Because we live in an odd version of Hell, he continued, "I never had that before. I used to watch it. It’d be like a rocket ship when I put out a beauty. Like when I said, remember I said somebody was spying on me? That thing was like a rocket. "

You got that, right? This is what the goddamn president is telling us he does. He tweets something and then watches the numbers on them. It's like the Nielsens of the damned for him. Trump needs those RTs and Likes to keep rolling up. He craves that validation, and he fears not having it, like an oxy freak getting to the bottom of the scrip bottle.

Then he revealed that he tweets just because he likes to see his shit on TV.  Trump slurred, "I said watch, I’m going to do this. And I said, 'We recognize the Golan Heights as being part of Israel.' It was a big thing. I go, watch this: boom! I press it, and within two seconds: 'We have breaking news.' John Roberts of Fox was over. He said, 'We have breaking news. Please, break it up.' Doesn’t matter what they’re talking about, John does it. He breaks it up." Beyond obviously not understanding what the word "breaking" means in "breaking news," that's some scary shit right there. It's some fin de siecle megalomaniacal fuckery, like a cruel, inbred king executing a servant because he can.

So Trump, again, ostensibly the leader of the free world, says that he wastes his days thinking of tweets to fuck with the flow of the news cycle and watches to see how much people love him. Add to that his daily viewing of Fox and Friends and whatever fucking nonsense One America has on, and, really, except when he's in front of the cameras telling us shit like "You know, there’s a word called 'communism,'" except when he's glad-handing dictators and right-wing crazies and congressional fellaters, he's not doing a goddamn thing at his job.

It's pathetic. It's pathetic that he cares so much about his shitty tweets. And it's pathetic that I'm fucking relieved that he's so lazy and incompetent.

7/09/2019

No One Is Going to Save Us... (Part 1)

After Donald Trump was inaugurated, I heard dozens of predictions about how soon he would fall and be forced out of the presidency. I talked to people In The Know or people who would mention a friend who's an intelligence agent, and they all knew, with near certainty, that we were mere months from the wheels of justice and the righteous government of the United States rejecting Trump like he was a dog's arm grafted onto our precious human bodies. I was told it would be October 2017, November 2017, "by Christmas" 2017, and then it was several times throughout 2018. "You see, they'd say, "the spooks are gonna take him down. The career officers, they know that he's up to his neck in money-laundering" or "child sex trafficking" or simply "Russia." These savior spies never appeared.

But we, oh, we hoped, god, how we hoped, listening to every confident conspiracy-spinner on MSNBC, just believing that, at any second, a thread would be pulled, the wrong Jenga piece would be moved, and everything would finally fall apart for Trump. We moved on to the investigation of Robert Mueller, and we thought that here, finally, would be the back-breaking straw. And while we have not fully grappled with what was actually in the report Mueller and his team produced, while the number of times Trump clearly obstructed justice is overwhelming and the associations with the Russian government are damning, still, it didn't shake the foundation of this administration in any permanent way.

Because we are such hopeful creatures, we liberals, we keep believing that some cataclysm will break this dark fever. Some of us even thought that the horrors that would be revealed in the indictment of child rapist Jeffrey Epstein might be awful revelations about Trump that led to his comeuppance. That case is still in its early stages, and this is not to mention what Mueller might say when he testifies next week, but stop, just stop.

No one is going to save us. It's just that simple. While there have been and may still be a couple of Supreme Court decisions that don't gut democracy and civil rights, no one is going to save us from the depravity of this administration, from its extravagant flouting of rules and laws meant to prevent corruption of public officials to its enraging, inhumane mistreatment of migrants to its utter incompetence in just about every area that requires a rational federal government to its abandonment of any policy that would mitigate the speeding train of the climate crisis that is going to wreck us.

There is no political Santa Claus. There will be no insurgency by angry intelligence agents. There is no ninth-dimensional plan that Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi has as to why she's not calling for an impeachment inquiry. She has no secret information that Trump is going down for some other crime. And while I could spend the rest of this post on the boggling refusal of Pelosi to impeach while she has the House pass meaningless bill after meaningless bill, I don't want to just focus on her failure in this pivotal historical moment.

We are seeing the result of decades of conservative planning to get the public to the moment where they no longer believe in anyone but the right's own media, where plain facts don't matter, where images of strength are far, far more important than actual strength. And, as Ryan Grim demonstrated in a great piece, we are dealing with a Democratic leadership group that has never gotten over its post-Reagan stress disorder. Democrats never learned to fight Republicans. We thought winning elections would be enough. We thought that the factual reality of more people having access to health care would be enough. We thought that things that polled well, like abortion rights, like stricter gun laws, like action on climate change, would be enough. We thought that Trump being a damned embarrassment every time he opens his mouth would be enough. We thought that going high when they went low would be enough.

It's not. It never was.

Republican learned back when Reagan was calling the news the "liberal media" on a regular basis, when they impeached Bill Clinton because it made the evangelicals and Clinton haters happy, when they hammered every minor thing, like a flag-burning case, into a national crisis, that the fight is all there is. They relish the fight, they live for the fight, and they can't wait for the next chance to fight, even if they have to manufacture it. They don't care about rules, they don't care about pissing off their opponents, and that's why Trump will end up appointing nearly a third of all federal judges by the end of his first term. That's why Republicans will end up contorting our voting rights until only white conservative men get a say.

And while a whole lot of us on the left, many of us who call ourselves "Democrats," have fought like hell, and while Democratic leaders may want to fight on issues, they hate it when the fight becomes personal. Sure, some Democrats will call out particular Republicans on their awfulness, but the goal is to try to shame a shameless person like Mitch McConnell. When Republicans go after someone, the goal is to destroy them and create a new identity for the person. Look at what they did with the Clintons. Look at what they're doing with Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Republicans do this because it works. Democrats won't. They flinch and shy away, as if it's just too unseemly.

What do I mean by that? President Obama should have had Democrats go on the warpath over McConnell's refusal to consider the Supreme Court nomination of Merrick Garland. McConnell should have been turned into an enemy of the nation. Instead, it was treated with the political equivalent of an eyeroll. Would it have worked? We'll never know.

You want something more recent? Trump was credibly accused of rape, with activity that is of a piece with other behavior he's admitted to. It should be something that Democrats say with outrage over and over, in every discussion. And if Democrats can't take the head of Labor Secretary Alex Acosta, who helped get a sweetheart deal for child rapist Epstein, then they have no business in modern politics.

That's all blind hope, the same kind of blind hope that made us think that some bit of scandal magic would take down Trump. Sorry. No one is going to save us. We're on our own. So we damn well better save ourselves.

7/03/2019

What to Expect at Donald Trump's America Is So Great ExMAGAganza

From a press release from the Department of the Interior regarding the 4th of July Celebration of President Trump:

This year's annual Independence Day celebration on the National Mall will feature music, flyovers, fireworks, and an address by President Donald J. Trump. The America Is So Great ExMAGAganza will show the proper way to honor Donald Trump, including each of the nation’s five service branches with music, military demonstrations, multiple flyovers including a flight demonstration by the Blue Angels, and much more. The theme is "Trump Is Awesome."

The Navy's Blue Angels will do a flyover. In honor of President Trump, they will fly in a newly-created formation called "The Sky Pussy" where five of the jets create the shape of a vulva overhead. A sixth jet moves in close to the Sky Pussy for a maneuver named "the Grabber 180." The Grabber jet quickly moves in and out of the Sky Pussy, at which point the Sky Pussy jets emit special pink contrails as an indication that the Sky Pussy loved being touched by the Grabber.

The National America Is So Great ExMAGAganza Parade will be a celebration of all the things that Donald Trump has made great. It will feature floats showing President Trump shaking hands with Kim Jong-Un while starving North Koreans cheer for them as soldiers point guns on the citizens. Another float will feature a performer dressed like Saudia Arabia's Prince Mohammed bin Salman juggling the body parts of murdered journalist Jamal Khashoggi. He'll be standing on the throats of Saudi women while doing it. A marching band will play the Russian national anthem while the Marine Silent Drill Team shows off its precision moves, culminating in a "Salute to Putin and Friendship," where everyone drops their pants and pisses on each other.

The parade will also feature caged migrants on a flatbed. This display will demonstrate how the United States under President Trump is treating migrants seeking asylum better than they were being treated in their own countries. People in attendance will be cautioned not to hand them soap or toothbrushes or even a stuffed animal for one of the children. You never know how the caged migrant will act if they receive minimal amounts of human compassion.

When the parade reaches the VIP area, t-shirt cannons will be fired by National Guard members, but they will be filled with wads of cash in a demonstration of President Trump's tax cut. Any money not picked up by the VIPs will be given directly to President Trump.

One float will just be Brett Kavanaugh drinking beer. The real Brett Kavanaugh in his Supreme Court robes. Just enjoying beer. He likes beer.

Before President Trump speaks, the American National Anthem will be played. Anyone caught kneeling, not singing, or not crying tears of patriotic joy will be immediately arrested. The subject of President Trump's speech will be a totally nonpolitical look back on how much better the country is now that he's president. He will totally nonpolitically talk about how the press is the enemy of the people and that Democrats want open borders and crime and violence. Then he will totally nonpolitically mock Nancy Pelosi and the U.S. Women's Soccer Team as not being bangable enough for him. Finally, President Trump will totally nonpolitically name his daughter as his Vice Presidential running mate. "And what a mate she'll be," the President will say as a weeping Mike Pence still stands by his side.

Two fireworks displays will light up the DC skies. The first is themed "Look at This Shit Blow Up, Iran," and it will be an imitation of the annihilation that awaits Iran if it doesn't live up to its part of the nuclear deal that the United States withdrew from. The second will be "I Like Big Boom," and President Trump will point and nod in imitation of an idiot while the First Lady looks on uncomfortably smiling, as if asking for the sweet kiss of death.

At the end, President Trump will go fuck a tank and command the heads of the five branches of the military to all make out with each other while he does it. A blood orgy on the mall will ensue among the onlookers when Jerry Falwell, Jr. cuts open a donkey in symbolic murder of a Democrat. He will fellate the disembodied donkey dick while blood pours onto the audience, driving them into a savage frenzy of fucking and murder that will dye the reflecting pool as red as a MAGA hat.

So bring the whole family.

The Park Service has already said that the biggest crowd in the history of Independence Day is attending the Donald Trump's America Is So Great ExMAGAganza, and you were there, even if you weren't.

7/02/2019

Another Goddamn Podcast: Interview with Reece Peck and Online Ministries Tell the Tennessee Legislature to Suck It

The latest episode of Another Goddamn Podcast is up, and it's a festive one.

First, I tell you about how an online ministry told the Tennessee legislature to go fuck itself when the state passed a law saying that marriages performed by people who got their ordination online aren't legit.

Then, you've got the second part of my interview with media analyst Reece Peck, author of Fox Populism: Branding Conservatism as Working Class. He's watched more Fox "news" than any single human should ever have to, and it's a tribute to him that he hasn't gone on a 5-state killing spree.

We talk about how it pissed me off that he was sure Trump was going to win in 2016, and then we get into his upbringing as a Mormon in Utah and the ways the LDS church is becoming surprisingly more open. Of course, I had to ask him about the Mormon doctrine that says masturbation is just below murder on the list of sins. It gets weird and funny.

Check it out, like a shockingly large number of people already have. Listen on your favorite podcast platform. Download it. Rate it. Review it. Make sweet love to it.

(For tender ears and eyes, it's called AGD Podcast, but we all know it's just Another Goddamn Podcast.)

While I'm plugging, check out other great podcasts on the Sexy Liberal Podcast Network, from Dean Obeidallah's I Want to Be Your Muslim Friend to Dana Goldberg's Out in Left Field (she talks to the amazing Charlotte Clymer this week), not to mention Bob Cesca, Randi Rhodes, Frangela, Proud Resister, Jody Hamilton, John Fugelsang, and the grand dame herself, Stephanie Miller (her Happy Hour with Busy Phillips is a blast).

It'll help get you through these tough times and tell you, "Oh, shit, I'm really not alone in how much rage I'm feeling."

6/27/2019

Random Observations on John Roberts Buggering Democracy Today

1. The Supreme Court's decision allowing partisan gerrymandering of congressional districts was essentially a nonconsensual buggering of American democracy. By 5-4 vote, the craven conservative cocks, led by Chief Justice John Roberts, said, "Yeah, we don't give a rat's ass. Contort the shit out of districts, state legislatures, to ensure that your party always grabs an unfair number of the state's congressional representatives." Actually, what Roberts said was that the federal courts had no role in deciding it because that would make the court look too political, as if every fucking decision ever made by the Supreme Court isn't considered political (see 5-4 majority comprised solely of craven conservative cocks).

1a. You could bottom line the decision as "¯\_(ツ)_/¯."

2. The actual text of Roberts' opinion was even more confounding. It's like reading a letter from someone explain why he fucked your dog to death by blaming your dog for being too sexy and saying he was doing you a favor. For one, Roberts makes the usual bullshit conservative argument of bringing in the nation's founders. In this case, he says that they didn't have a gerrymandering problem: "The Founders certainly did not think proportional representation was required. For more than 50 years after ratification of the Constitution, many States elected their congressional representatives through at-large or 'general ticket' elections. Such States typically sent single-party delegations to Congress." And then they changed it. You know, whenever tries to read the minds of some rich white guys from 250 years ago, all I can think is "Those motherfuckers owned slaves, treated women as chattel, were drunk most of the time, and shit in a bowl while trying to come up with better ways to murder Indians and take their land. Why the fuck do we still pretend like every word they say applies now?"

3. Even more goddamned aggravating is how Roberts appealed to some illusion of democracy and fairness. He acts like the very notion of the court deciding issues of "fairness" is utterly beyond its scope. After listing several possible versions of "fairness" (only one of which is actually "fair"), he writes, "Even assuming the court knew which version of fairness to be looking for, there are no discernible and manageable standards for deciding whether there has been a violation." How about starting with the fact that the intent was obviously racist. Not for Roberts, though: "Unlike partisan gerrymandering claims, a racial gerrymandering claim does not ask for a fair share of political power and influence, with all the justiciability conundrums that entails. It asks instead for the elimination of a racial classification. A partisan gerrymandering claim cannot ask for the elimination of partisanship." No, but if you're carving out black and Latinx people and isolating them in weird-ass shaped districts to secure Republican seats and limit Democratic seats, that's racist. Roberts doesn't buy that shit, saying that it doesn't matter if there's racism involved as long as you can make a case that it's more partisan than racist: "A permissible intent—securing partisan advantage—does not become constitutionally impermissible, like racial discrimination, when that permissible intent 'predominates.'" As Elana Kagan says in her dissent, you're just fucking saying that one party's votes are more important than another party's and that's really unfair when each person's vote should be equal. And since those party lines are often determined by the number of people from racial groups in them, it's got a racist intent.

3a. And, by the way, one of the two cases here was about the fucked up way that Maryland gerrymanders in favor of Democrats by carving out a white people area. This shit swings both ways, but right now, because Republicans have taken over most state legislatures, it's gonna end up favoring Republicans overall. But demography is destiny and that pendulum can swing back, assholes.

4. To an extent, then, the Court's decision to postpone a final judgment on whether or not to have a citizenship question on the census is useless. If states can just carve up districts like a spastic monkey with box of crayons, what does it matter how many people are in the state? However, of course, the other part of this is that total number of citizens determines total number of representatives per state. And if you get rid of all the non-citizens too afraid to answer and citizens who don't want to answer, then states like New York and California will lose seats and they will go to the shithole states. That's why it's hilarious to see conservatives go nutzoid in anger at Roberts for not giving them every goddamn thing they wanted right now.

4a. I put it at about even odds that Trump just orders that the question be put on the census form and dares anyone to fuckin' stop him. Why wouldn't he? Really, who would stop him?

5. The real winner today is Mitch McConnell. Because of his blank-faced evil and complete lack of ethics, he wiped his ass with Senate tradition and the Constitution and told everyone to sniff it. McConnell has engineered a generational shift in the judicial system of the United States, starting with his theft of the Supreme Court seat that should have been Merrick Garland's. Gotta hand it to him: the man has said that he's a motherfucker, and he brought out a whole bunch of mothers and just fucked them in every hole he could and in a few he made himself. Because that's what motherfuckers do. They fuck mothers. It's right there in the word.

6. And, as ever, the big fucking losers are Democrats, who barely whimpered over the Garland fuckery, who have been able to do little more than sit with their fingers up their asses while Republicans fuck their faces, and who, when they have power, will probably say that it's time to be nice again because bipartisanship or comity or whatever the fuck.

6a. The fact that, so far, the Democratic National Committee has paid so little attention to winning back the Senate demonstrates an utter failure of leadership and imagination. Jesus fuck, if I had a couple of billion dollars, I'd fucking offer to move thousands of people from urban districts to suburban districts in gerrymandered states just to fuck it all up. I'd fight so fucking dirty that Karl Rove would jack off to the Machiavellian shit I would do. Democrats haven't learned that, and until we get this entrenched leadership the fuck out of there, the ones who still flinch when Republicans raise a hand, they just won't.

6/24/2019

The President of the United States Is Likely a Rapist and Nothing Is Being Done About That

I believe, as I have believed for a long time, that Donald Trump is a rapist. The allegations by E. Jean Carroll of Trump raping her in the dressing room at Bergdorf Goodman are horrifying, and, in any sane country, they would be the end of Trump's presidency. But we don't live in anything like a sane country anymore. We are on a steep incline now, heading faster and faster into a darkness at the end of it. Each event and allegation that we simply overlook or ignore speeds us down, and, at some point, we're not going to be able to grab onto the ground to stop our fall. It's always going to get worse, it seems.

Because every day provides evidence of this, this afternoon, in a comment on Carroll's allegations, Trump made it worse. Talking to the Hill, the President of the United States said this about a respected writer who accused him of rape: "I’ll say it with great respect: Number one, she’s not my type. Number two, it never happened. It never happened, OK?"

Think about that. Sitting in the Oval Office, the center of power for supposedly the most powerful person in the world, the first thing our president wanted us to know is that his alleged rape victim wasn't his type. At best, that means Trump doesn't like strong, self-possessed women. At worst (and most likely), it means she wasn't fuckable enough for him to rape. It was more important to him for us to hear that he has a certain taste in women than it was that he didn't rape Carroll. Putting aside the truth of the allegation, you have to be an essentially terrible man to open with a judgment on how hot your rape accuser is. (And Trump has used the "not my type" reasoning often, even talking about Stormy Daniels.) And a whole lot of people are going to believe Trump on that. I've already had people send me tweets and messages saying that Carroll wasn't attractive enough for the obviously too handsome Donald Trump, as if that really matters in any way when it comes to rape.

I believe Carroll for many reasons. I know and trust two people who know Carroll, and they say they believe her. I believe her because I know many women from Carroll's generation and the nightmare of sexism and assault they had to negotiate just to work in their chosen fields. Talk to many women who were grad students or became university professors in the 1960s and 1970s or even the 1980s, as they infiltrated the old boys networks at supposedly liberal colleges. It wasn't a minefield. It was a full-on battle.

For decades, Carroll has had an incredibly successful career as a writer, as a beloved advice columnist, as a trusted figure in the lives of many people, especially women. To just make this story up now does her no good; in fact, if she were lying, she would torch her entire life's work. And she didn't need a fake Trump story (or a fake story of any of the men she writes about) in her forthcoming book to make it successful. Her thousands of readers would likely have done that anyway. She knew that she was going to get a buzzsaw of hatred and condemnation coming at her, and it's already happening.

On the socials, the right wing commentariat are saying that Carroll discredited herself this evening on CNN in an interview with Anderson Cooper. It was a fascinating appearance, with Carroll refusing to play the part of the tearful victim. She was bitingly witty with an awareness and sensitivity to women who have experienced more violent sexual assaults than she did. I'm sure that her attitude is going to confound a whole lot of sexists and Trump apologists, but they don't get to say how a woman processes her rape. She wants to own this story, although I'm sure she knows that that is going to be impossible now. I'm betting she's getting rape and death threats constantly. That's how we live now.

One of the most depressing things Carroll told Cooper is that she believes all the accusations of sexual assault against Donald Trump actually helped his candidacy. She told a story about being out to dinner with George McGovern when Bill Clinton's affairs were being revealed in 1992 (this was prior to Paula Jones and allegations of sexual misconduct). McGovern said it would help Clinton because it makes him seem more virile and manly to many people. Carroll said she thinks the same thing happened with Trump, that it made him seem like he was so masculine that he could take any woman he wanted, and that he could have sex with anyone, like porn stars, and then pay them off. That sadly makes sense, considering his supporters.

Today, I was talking to a young woman who is a Trump voter. She was trying to tell me he was a good person because he once had his limo pull over and had his employee help her mom and aunt change a flat tire and then he paid off her aunt's mortgage. I said, "Maybe, but he's a rapist." She said she didn't know what I was talking about. I repeated, "He's a rapist. He's been credibly accused of rape. More than once." She dismissed it with a wave of her hand, saying that "people just want to hurt him." I tried to point out that no one accused Barack Obama of rape (except, you know, deranged people). She didn't care. "They're all just jealous of Trump," she said.

It doesn't matter. No one is going to do anything. The New York Times and other news outlets buried the story, although the Washington Post featured it prominently. Fox "news" doesn't have anything on its website. The New York Post was ordered to scrub it from their site. I don't know how many days this story will stay alive, what with Trump's abuse of child migrants and war mongering with Iran also dominating the news.

I believe Carroll. I believe other women who have said that Trump assaulted them. I believe Ivana Trump when she said under oath that Trump raped her when they were married. I believe the president is a rapist, that our nation is being led by a rapist. And I honestly don't know what to do with that. I don't know what we do with that. This is where our other leaders are supposed to step in and help the country. But, as we slip further down this incline, they aren't trying to toss us ropes to save us. They are sliding with us into that chaotic, dark unknown below.

(Note: If your response to Carroll and the other allegations against Trump is "Yeah, but Bill Clinton..." then you're saying that you think Trump should get away with rape because you believe Clinton got away with rape. So you are a worthless human. Oh, and Clinton isn't president now.)