9/13/2011

GOP Debate: Compassion Is for Losers:
For a moment, forget about the candidates from last night's Republican debate in Tampa, Florida (state motto: "America's petri dish of batshittery"). They're a bunch of cheap circus clowns, the kind that didn't quite make it to Ringling or Cirque de Soleil, desperately juggling and honking horns to please the small audiences at their ratty tents, trying not to scare the children with their horrific and seedy antics. No, instead think for a moment about the audience at the Tea Party event hosted by CNN.

This was a group of Americans cheering for an American who chose not to have health insurance to die. Because, as Ron Paul said, "That's what freedom is all about." Paul was a bit more tactful than the audience about the hypothetical healthy 30-year old who gets sick, and even Paul backtracked a bit when he said, "[T]he churches took care of them. We never turned anybody away from the hospitals," which is sort of what we have now for the uninsured and it makes medical costs go up for everyone, which is one reason why health care reform was passed, which they all despise as "Obamacare," so, really, the best way to save money is to let sick people die because, really, giving a shit about your fellow human is, in Paul's words, "welfarism and socialism."

(Bonus points for this Paul quote: "[W]e should actually legalize alternative health care, allow people to practice what they want." Faith-healing and leeches for everyone.)

Do you get it now? Do you get the obscene cruelty of the fucktarded teabaggers that have been so ennobled by the obsequious media? At any moment where one of the candidates showed compassion for anything but a fetus, the audience booed. Ask Rick Perry, who was jeered when he defended allowing illegal immigrants to pay in-state tuition at Texas colleges by saying, "I'm proud that we are having those individuals be contributing members of our society rather than telling them, you go be on the government dole."

Perry, who got the love of the crowd at the last debate for having murdered 234 prisoners, was confused by the whole thing. Mostly because he's just a fucking idiot, but also because he did something good and he was excoriated for it, like his requirement that schoolgirls get the HPV vaccine. An NBC reporter tweeted today that Perry was "'taken aback' by cheers last nite for death of hypothetical uninsured man. 'We're the party of life'" he said.

If you've gotten too cruel for Rick Perry, then you're entering the territory of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre family.

On it went, with each candidate trying to out-bastard the other. Repeal Obamacare? Fuck that. Let's just off some motherfuckers. Reform Social Security? Fuck that. They were fucking traitors in the 1930s (no, really, Perry pretty much said that). Oh, and by the way, fuck you, Rick Perry, for taking donations from Merck, but it's totally tits that Honeywell gave big money to Bachmann.

Oh, how it turned them on, the teabaggers, who were fondling themselves whenever one of their talking points was parroted, getting all het up when Ron Paul didn't suck Israel's cock for their pleasure, hooting like the baboons they are for a nation where shit-tossing is a virtue and community is the same as communist.