6/06/2011

Stupid Fucking Sarah Palin Quotes You Didn't Hear About:
Yeah, yeah, Godzilla of Wasilla was busy this weekend, stomping on the Tokyo of Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum's futile presidential dreams. You've heard about her strange version of the Paul Revere story. You may have even heard when she told Fox "news" host Chris Wallace that it was in response to a "gotcha type of question," which is odd since the question she was responding to was "What have you seen so far today and what are you going to take away from your visit?"

The problem ain't the question. Palin could have answered, "We saw Paul Revere's house. What a great patriot." Done. No, the problem is that Sarah Palin can't shut the fuck up. Like a desperate college student who thinks that, if she keeps talking, the professor will just give her a "C" and let her pass, Palin treads water under the synapses in her brain fire off something like a sentence that includes some dreadful, devolved belief of hers. In this case, it was contorting the Paul Revere story into some kind of 2nd Amendment-related bullshit about arms.

However, the Disasta' from Alaska said lots of other blithering nonsense in that Fox "news" Sunday interview with the soulless shell of Chris Wallace. Hell, it was good enough for Mark Halperin, the -dum of the Game Change-writing Tweedles, to say that she gave strong answers. Whatever the fuck Halperin was talking about, it couldn't have been what she actually said, which were talking points slathered with Palin jelly. Revel in the stupid:

"[I]t's very noble of President Obama to want to stay at the helm and maybe go down with this sinking ship. But I prefer, many Americans prefer, that we start plugging the hole, that we start powering the build [sic] pump and start getting rid of this unsustainable debt that is sinking our ship. We don't have to go the way of the Titanic and there are things that have to be put in place right now before this ship does sink." So, to follow this metaphor, she wants Obama to abandon the sinking ship, but the ship might be the Titanic, which couldn't have been plugged, but if you toss out the debt, the ship will float, but then it's not a sinking ship anymore that President Obama would have abandoned or maybe he wouldn't abandon it if it wasn't sinking and...ow...owww.

"I have - I know that the debt ceiling will be raised, whether I want it to be raised or not. There is a majority in Congress, both sides of the aisle, that will raise the debt ceiling. If I were in Congress, though, I would be a 'no' vote to raising that debt ceiling. I would send that message that it is failed leadership in the White House and with our elected officials when they have allowed to us to get this breaking point, if you will, that Moody's is warning about. So, I vote no on the debt ceiling. It's just going to allow the big spenders another tool to continue to increase debt. So, I believe that the debt ceiling will be raised." Umm...oh, wait, it continues...

"But for those who are already committed to voting for it, they better get something out of it for 'We the people'...How about people like Senator Begich, a Democrat from Alaska. He better get ANWR in this bill, opening another domestic source of energy up there in Alaska when he votes yes for increasing the debt ceiling." You got that? Palin wants to hold the debt ceiling hostage in order to get drilling for oil in ANWR. Where did Halperin get the impression that these were remotely good or informed or anything other than mad answers? The rest of the interview is as numbing as two bullets to the back of the skull.

So maybe this is less about Palin, whose smarmy near-English reflects the head and mind of someone who has slipped on ice one too many times, and more about anyone who would still take Palin seriously in any way, shape, or form. She's the Anthony Weiner photo of the campaign season: it's way easier to talk about than actual things (even for this blogger). And perhaps we need to understand something else. We may want to be done with Palin, but, like a parasite that's feeding on a body, she ain't going anywhere until she's done with us.

By the way, could someone tell her that the words "that" and "those" are not fucking substitutes for "the"?