Chris Christie Is an Incompetent Boob and a Goddamned Liar (Part 994 of an Endless Series)

Now, the Rude Pundit is no big-time politician who is friends with football team owners and kings, nor is he running for president, but he's pretty damn sure that if he were governor of a state that just got face-fucked by an historic blizzard with historic floods, he'd probably think it's his responsibility to stay in his goddamn state, just to show everyone that he gives a happy monkey fuck. But not New Jersey Governor Chris Christie.

Oh, sure, he was shamed into leaving the campaign trail in New Hampshire for a day to hang out and drink hot chocolate with the kids back at home. But as soon as the storm was over (and it was a big fucking storm), Christie told the snow-coated Garden State to kiss his big happy ass goodbye and jetted off in a private plane. When questioned about that decision this morning on Morning Starbucks, Christie, as is his way, was a total cock about it: "I don't even know what critics you're talking about. There is no residual damage, there is no residual flooding damage. All the flooding receded yesterday morning. And there was no other damage."

And, sure, the southern portions of the Jersey Shore might be a little more Philadelphia, a little more Delaware, but, you know they are still part of the state that Christie allegedly runs.

That part of the state got floods that dwarfed Hurricane/Superstorm/Big Honkin' Weather Event Sandy for them. In fact, this was their Sandy, since that the south shore dodged that bullet. But this more than made up for it. The flood waters recorded were a foot higher than the previous record in some areas.

As for the aftermath, or, as Christie calls it, "residual damage," the governor must understand that if a building gets flooded, especially if it has three, four, five feet of water in it, there is damage that may involve gutting the place or condemning it. Certainly, there is a fuckload of shit messed up. And it ain't isolated to a couple of homes.

The mayor of that town up there, North Wildwood, said, "We had between four and five feet of water in the downtown. Our entire dune system was compromised, and we had a big breach on 3rd Avenue. We had whitecaps and ice flow right through town. It was surreal."

Christie is prancing around New Hampshire, calling himself "the disaster governor," and saying that makes him a good leader. Well, shit, at least he didn't just fuck off to Disney World this time. He pretended he gave a fuck for a few minutes. If deluding yourself and lying to people is leadership, then Chris Christie should be the fuckin' emperor of the world.