11/18/2015

Republicans Are Pussies Who Believe the United States Is Weak

This is simple: If you say that the United States or your state or your city or your little shithole by the ditch should ban refugees from Syria because ISIS fighters or Islamic terrorists or Sharia-packin' mules might get into the nation. you are a pussy. Because what you are saying is that you are so afraid of a couple of goatfuckers getting through and blowing themselves up that you would rather cringe in the dark and hide. And you think the nation is so pathetic and weak that those goatfuckers could actually have a shot at destroying Our Way of Life (spoiler: they don't).

Oh, sure, sure, you can pretend that you're standing up for security and you wanna keep Americans safe and holy shit, do you want to become Muslim? But you're really just a goddamn pussy, hoping that the evil dark-skinned man doesn't fuck you.

So we get the embarrassing spectacle of Republican after Republican (and, let's be honest, more than a few non-Republicans) trying to act tough and preen for the cameras and the delusional, inbred piglets that make up the GOP base and say that no way, no-how will you allow a Muslim Syrian fleeing the very enemy we're fighting to come to the land of the fighters. In purely nationalist terms, you are saying that it is better that 10,000 Syrians go back to be killed or radicalized than take the slim chance that a couple of Americans might be harmed.

All of the GOP presidential candidates are wearing their cowardice on their sleeves. All. Of. Them. Even fuckin' George Pataki and no one barely remembers that he exists.

Stupider still are Jeb Bush and Ted Cruz, who said we should have a religious test and allow only the Christians in because that way we'll be safe. Which really begs the question: Why the fuck wouldn't a terrorist pretend to be Christian to sneak in? Oh, wait, it doesn't make sense. It just sounds like you are making some bold statement about religious values to the aforementioned piglets.

By the way, the award for the biggest pussy who tried to sound tough and strong but sounded even more like a pussy goes to Chris Christie for declaring that he wouldn't let in even 5-year-old orphans. Real men tell orphan children to go fuck themselves back to their homelands to be raped and enslaved.

Who's not a pussy in all this? The Democrats (save a few exceptions) and President Obama, the ones who say, "You know what? It doesn't take a whole lot of bravery to help people who just want to stay alive."

The Rude Pundit has long been weary of the unspoken belief that Republicans are so much tougher than Democrats, that conservatives are so much braver than liberals. If you're hiding behind closed doors, cowering with your guns, believing that destruction is just around the corner, you're the pussy. Those of us who believe that our lives have meaning only in how we interact and help others are the goddamn strong ones. It's a fucking shame that courage has been reduced to just not being a dick all the time.