12/10/2018

Impeach the Motherfucker (Part 1: Don't Be Suckered by the Bill Clinton Comparison)

So much discussion is going on about whether or not Democrats should go forward with the impeachment of President Donald Trump, who is actually a bulging tower of rotting cantaloupes in a terrible-fitting suit. Many in the punditocracy are telling the incoming House majority to avoid impeachment and not even speak of it. Obviously, the chances of removing Trump from office in a trial after the House impeaches are slim to none, considering that the Senate will be made of 47 Democrats and 53 puking shit demons from GOP. We know that the puking shit demons aren't going to vote against their puking shit demon leader, and Democrats would need 20 of those vile fuckers to toss Trump into the toilet of history.

On WNYC this morning, Mara Liasson was making that point: why bother even talking about it when it's not gonna happen? She said that Democrats are worried that "if they go hellbent toward impeachment instead of passing legislation - even if that legislation goes nowhere in the Senate, it won't be signed by President Trump, at least they want to lay out an agenda for the voters - there will be a political backlash."

Then she used the well-worn point that the Bill Clinton impeachment led to Democratic gains in the 1998 midterms. Except we're not talking a massive tide here. Democrats gained 5 seats in the House and didn't lose any in the Senate. Yeah, that was a big deal compared to the 1994 ass-reaming the GOP gave to Democrats. But Republicans still ran Congress in 1999. And they still "won" the presidency in 2000 and kept control of Congress, at least until Senator Jim Jeffords left the GOP in May of 2001. The GOP won the Senate back in 2002. (Note: George W. Bush didn't really win in 2000, but we have been damned to pretend as if he did.)

So this idea that somehow Republicans suffered electorally is just a goddamn lie. Then-Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich suffered because he was forced out of the House for lots of hinky shit. Next in line for Speaker, Republican Bob Livingston, suffered because he resigned after he was caught fucking around on his wife. That's how we got child fucker Dennis Hastert for Speaker. Oh, the late 1990s were so charming. As far as elections go, though, Republicans lost a little bit, but not enough to drive them away. Not enough to make them stop being scandal-mongering, hypocritical ass-worms.

Besides, the reason the Clinton impeachment was such a fuckin' farce was that no one could point to anything that President Clinton got out of his lie, other than that his wife might have believed he wasn't fucking around this one time (despite the fact that we all knew he fucked around). There was no use of his office for financial or political gain, and Kenneth Starr desperately fucking tried to find something. Clearly, Trump is doing shit for financial and political gain, that bloated sleazeball.

Sure, Clinton lied under oath, which, yes, is a crime. But he lied under oath for purely personal reasons that had nothing to do with his ability to do his job defending the Constitution. (Yes, I get the irony of saying that a perjurer is defending the Constitution. You are very smart for thinking that. Pat yourself on the back and shut the fuck up.) People realized that this was bullshit and a rigged investigation after a series of bullshit investigations by lying Republicans, and they stood by Clinton.

See, the other big factor was that Bill Clinton's job approval was hovering around 60% throughout the sex scandal period, going up to 66% near the 1998 midterms. It was enough stop Republicans from getting the usual midterm gains for the party opposite the president. That's the "loss" you hear about. They fucked themselves even that much because they were obsessed with Clinton's penis and the American people were not.

But, again, that's not the whole story. Americans didn't start supporting Clinton because of impeachment. Indeed, after his 1996 inauguration, he never went below 50% for the rest of his presidency.  Now, I may not be a math whiz, but it seems like anything from 60-66% is a bigger number than 40%, which is where Donald Trump hovers in approval. And on disapproval? Clinton rarely went above 40% and mostly stayed in the low-to-mid 30s. Trump is high 50s to 60%. In other words, the majority of Americans were fucking fine with Bill Clinton. The majority of Americans are far from fucking okay with Donald Trump.

And they'll be fine with impeachment.

Next: Why it doesn't matter if Trump can be removed from office right now.