The Haiku Review of 2018: Wow, That All Really Happened

Oh, good people of Left Blogsylvania and the Prog Twitterverse and all the liberal socials, at the end of every long December, this here little corner of the internets looks back on the fucked up year not through longform, naval-gazing hot takes and not through endless lists of infobits. No, around these parts, we write haiku. Over the last decade plus, a thousand or so of you have submitted and had them either summarily rejected by me or forever ennobled in these filthy pages.

So that time is upon us once again. Submit your haiku about events in goddamned 2018 to "rudepundit(at)yahoo(dot)com." I am the sole arbiter of all things haiku here, and my judgment is susceptible to various impairments both legal and not.

I'm a stickler for the form: one line of 5 syllables, one line of 7 syllables, and one line of 5 syllables, in that order. They can be as filthy, funny, or fucked-up as you like. You can be serious, silly, or sanctimonious. Titled or untitled. The best ones get published on here over the next few days, so lemme know what name you want on it (in case your boss or mate or Mom sees it) and where you're from. Like "Cockknocker from Shitheel, AK" or "Linda from San Francisco" or something.

Here are few to get your brain juices a-flowing:

Brett Kavanaugh whined
That women dare judge the judge.
Squee toasted with beer.

An orange monster
Lashing out at brain phantoms
Is our president

Prison will be tough
For a supple little boy
Like Jared Kushner.

That was so simple. Join in the fun. Send 'em on in, and I'll post a bunch, along with more of my own. Let's all kick the darkness of 2018 until it bleeds daylight.