2/26/2009

Why Ann Coulter Is a Cunt (Part 10,725 of a Neverending Series):
Because in her latest "column" (if by "column," you mean, "a collection of words spun from the salty tears of Indian orphans, the shiny blood of dead soldiers, and Sean Hannity's semen"), it isn't that Coulter makes a Slumdog Millionaire reference related to Bobby Jindal. (It's an easy and obvious joke that the Rude Pundit considered for yesterday, but quickly tossed aside as too easy and obvious.) It's not because she calls Nancy Pelosi "mentally retarded." It's not in the way she mocks the media's obsession with Barack Obama's race. No, it's because, in her increasingly crazed and desperate attempt to keep her demihuman cuntbeast readers salivating, she once again decides to beat up on those who are just doing their fuckin' jobs trying to make the world a better place.

Talking about Obama's praise for schoolteachers and their inclusion in the stimulus bill, Coulter squeals snatchishly, "Because nothing says 'economic stimulus' better than saving the jobs of lethargic incompetents who kick off at 2 p.m. every day and get summers off. Actually, that's not fair: Some teachers spend long hours after school having sex with their students." In some hellish dictionary, that line ought to be an example of the definition of "cunt."

As the Rude Pundit's said many a time, arguing with Ann Coulter is useless. It's like attempting to explain morality and ethics to a a child rapist/murderer while he's balls deep in the head of a dead boy. Even if he was paying attention, the action he's taking kind of makes the whole effort a sad waste of time.

Coulter loves to beat up on public schoolteachers. One might ask why pick on people who, with some terrible exceptions, yes, put in roughly ten hours a day between the actual schoolday, preparation, grading, and meetings, putting up with fucktard parents and apathetic kids, often in shitty, underfunded schools while being forced by conservatives to teach to tests that are mandated and that have virtually nothing to do with what and how one actually learns, people who are excoriated by the right for asking for a little job security and fair wages. Yeah, one might ask that. But, really, it's like asking why Coulter likes to use ribbed dildos made of puppy spines in a vain attempt to get some feeling in her calloused clit.

Yeah, Coulter spent a great deal of her book Godless attacking teachers. In fact, she loved what she wrote back in 2006 so very much, that she fucking quotes it extensively in this week's "column." No, one can't plagiarize oneself. But perhaps one ought to honestly present the source of statistic and facts and say they're a couple of years old:

For instance, in this, her February 26, 2009 scribbles, she says, "While 80 percent of the employees of private schools are teachers, only half the employees of public schools are."

In 2006's Godless, page 152, she wrote, "At private schools, 80 percent of the personnel are teachers. By contrast, at public schools, only 50 percent of the personnel are actual teachers." This statistic is from a 2005 New York Sun article, itself quoting a 1999 study. So Coulter is presenting information that's a decade old as new.

She also writes this week that, in fourth grade, "American students outperform most other countries in reading, math and science. Fourth-graders score in the 92nd percentile in science, the 58th percentile in math and the 70th percentile in reading, where they beat 26 of 35 countries, including Germany, France and Italy." This is verbatim, a cut and paste job from page 151 of Godless, not even her most recent goddamn book. And it's drawn from stats from 2000-2003.

Who's her fucking editors? It's one thing to make the same point over and over. It shows you have no other points to make. But to present information that's over 5 years old as new? That's just fucking lying. Then again, why just be a cunt when you can be a lying cunt?