To Republicans in the House - Welcome to the Party, Bitches:
It's always sad to see a prison bitch attempt to stand up for himself. After months, years, even, of being forced to wear women's clothes, passed around from inmate to inmate, whored out for drugs, cigs, and little bits of cash by his "Daddy" or "Husband" or "Owner," having to deal with the different needs of the different cons who fuck him - whether it's the Latin King who beats the shit out of him after blowing a load on his face because the cholo can't stand the Catholic guilt of liking the cocksucking or the Crip who makes the bitch tape his dick between his legs so the Crip can pretend he's just fuckin' the ass of his girl on the outside or the Aryan Brotherhood guys who like to make fuck him two, three, five at a time, high-fivin' as they pretend they're not really fuckin' each other. Yeah, there comes a pathetic moment for every prison bitch where he thinks his time has come and he's gonna use that shiv he's been sharpenin' for weeks on his husband, sick and tired of being a wife, of making beds and cleaning johns and getting fucked again and again, washing blood, semen, and piss out of clothes and sheets. He's gonna try, this "girl," this fuck toy, to take a stand, and the really, sad, shake-your-head part is that after he pulls that shiv, unless he's willing to go all the way and stab that fucker who's been pimpin' him, stab him so crazy that he can dance with the entrails he pulls out, all it's gonna mean is more raping, more beating, and probably, sadly, finally, being offed by some implement or other being shoved up his ass.

So when James Sensenbrenner, the Republican Representative for the fine white suburbs and farmlands of Wisconsin's Fifth District, dares to stand up to the White House with his little show hearing about the FBI raid on William Jefferson's office, one can only smirk and think, "Goddamn, you fat wad of fuck, did they finally fuck you so hard in the sphincter that you coughed up Karl Rove's cum?" And then one follows that thought with, "The only thing better than fucking a prison bitch who fights back is fucking one who's been slapped down."

'Cause mostly for the last five years, Sensenbrenner's been a good bitch to the White House, eagerly cock gobbling whatever raping of civil rights, the environment, or human rights he was given. Hell, everyone has fond memories of Sensenbrenner's respect of his colleagues and the rules of the House of Representatives when, as Chairman of the Judiciary Committee, he took his gavel and went home at a Patriot Act Reauthorization hearing where the Democrats dared to say that his husband was violating the nation.

Now, here's Sensenbrenner, who's let the White House tear through Congress and the separation of powers with all the force of a rhino fucking a chihuahua, sounding like Elmer Fudd speaking out against plugging guns with carrots: "A constitutional question is raised when communications between Members of Congress and their constituents – documents having nothing to do with any crime – are seized by the Executive Branch without constitutional authority. This seizure occurred without so much as lawyers or representatives of Congress being allowed to simply observe the search and how it was conducted." Aww, fuck, ain't that cute? Watching James Sensebrenner and other Republicans take a stand for rights, the Constitution, and the rule of law is a little like watching a Penn State fraternity take a stand against underage drinking and date rape.

What was the straw that finally broke the hippo's back? The Jefferson raid? Sweet merciful fuck, Sensenbrenner was all about the separation and balance of powers back in the day when he was trying Bill Clinton: "The framers of the Constitution devised an elaborate system of checks and balances to insure our liberties by making sure that no person, institution, or branch of government became so powerful that a tyranny could ever be established in the United States of America." Now this porcine piece of shit is only giving a happy monkey fuck because the Bush administration extended its disdain for Congress into Sensenbrenner's home. Ain't it pathetic to see the last house standing in the midst of a conflagration where the owner is using his garden hose to keep it all from burning down?

'Course, at the end of the day, most prison bitches put away the shiv, hide it in the mattress, or behind the brick, and go on receiving the fucking, behaving graciously that at least his husband is protecting him from real harm, you know. So Sensenbrenner ended his opening remarks at his "Reckless Justice" hearing by praising the President for the 45-day period of sealing the documents seized from Jefferson's office, saying, "The President has allowed for precisely the sort of reasoned deliberation on important issues of separation of powers I expect this hearing to accord with today." Yeah, now come on back to Daddy and drop your panties. It's lights out on the block.