11/11/2005

President Bush - We Will Win This War That We Can't Ever Win:
The Rude Pundit's not sure, but did the President of the United States admit today, in his great and mighty Veterans Day speech, that going into Iraq ain't gonna do jackshit to stop Islamic fundamentalist hatred of America? Bush said, in answering his critics (like, you know, his own State Department) that going into Iraq has increased the amount of anger against us, "We were not in Iraq on September 11, 2001...[The hatred] existed before we were in Iraq, and it will exist after we're gone." [Quotes are approximate - no transcript yet.]

So, like, let's see if we've got this straight: Bush essentially stated that nothing will change for Americans because of our Iraqi venture. That wasn't off the cuff, that wasn't in answer to a question, that was his goddamned prepared speech. Yet, as he continues to say, we must stay the course. And that course would be to ensure that nothing changes for the United States, save the loss of thousands of lives, limbs, and minds, and, of course, our national identity and treasury.

If this is the opening salvo in a fight to regain the credibility Bush has lost, it was limp, like when you've had too much cocaine and you've told the hooker you paid good money for that you're gonna fuck her so hard she'll forget every other john she's ever fucked, but after you drop your pants you realize you can't get it up any more and you just end up flaccidly slapping the hooker in her face with your dangling dick until she just gets tired and leaves. What's more pathetic? That you couldn't get it up? That you had to hire the hooker? Or that the hooker got bored with your limp prick?

The best Bush could offer was the same shit he's been flingin' since the campaign: "Hey, Democrats said I could go to war." In other words, Congress gave him the cocked gun; blame them if he shoots it. He pronounced that "Congress approved with strong bipartisan support" the authority for Bush to wage war, and that now it's "irresponsible to rewrite the history of how the war began." Which is odd, since Senator Jay Rockefeller and now John Edwards are saying not that their votes for the war didn't happen, but that they were wrong. That ain't revisionism. It's an apology for a grave error, a way of saying let's find out why we made such a stupid decision. Bush continued the lie that Congress saw the "same intelligence" that he saw, even quoting John Kerry (who he would not name) about the vote for the war. It's his last fig leaf before his tiny, raisinette balls are revealed.

Oh, but don't you dare expect such an admission of wrongness from Bush, though. If you're against the war, motherfuckers, you're against the troops. The soldiers, Bush said, "deserve to know that their elected leaders who voted to send them to war continue to stand behind them." And, of course, we're gonna keep making sure Americans die until the job is done. By the way, if you didn't support the war, Bush said, you "didn't support the liberation of Iraq." God, we're such terrible people, we who think the war is a sham and a failure. And we'd better gird our loins for the coming war with Syria.

It was a ridiculous attempt to rally the loyal troops, to give himself the mantle of morality, to blame others, and to remain that stubborn fucker the nation sees him as. What's out there now about Bush is that he lied, his administration lied, and that Americans are dying for those lies. And assuring people that there's gonna be a fuck of a lot more death before he's done with this country, the U.S., not Iraq, sure as shit ain't gonna make up for poll numbers that say two-thirds of the nation think Bush is a festering wad of fuck.

Bush got all movie-quotable again, saying, "We will never back down. We will never give in. We will never accept anything less than complete victory" against that thing that he said will be there when we're gone from Iraq. And anyone who expects anything like conciliation or recognition of past mistakes by this White House better toss those dreams out the window. Like the Rude Pundit said yesterday, the Bush administration is gonna fight like a cornered wolverine. Time for Democrats to break out the tranq gun.

(Advice to Democrats on Monday. Give oral pleasure to a veteran today. It's the polite, liberal way to say, "Thanks.")