The President's News Conference Falls in a Forest of Reporters...:
President Bush's press conferences are now infused with the flop-sweat stench of the bedroom of a couple of old gay men, whose fucking never real tore up the sheets and now their desiccated prostates have long put their cocks out of commission, attempting a futile kind of flaccid dick-slapping sex that takes all the fun out of erectile dysfunction. Really, they may as well just cuddle.

Yesterday, the gathered reporters treated George W. Bush less like an elected leader whose unchecked and unquestioned decisions could still result in each and every one of their deaths and more like a beloved three-legged cocker spaniel that's blind and pissing itself but is still eager to arthritically beg for treats. Beyond a few questions about the teetering-on-the-brink Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae, which the President answered by assuring them that it's all cool, the reporters tossed balls as soft as testicles made of Nerf.

Do you think the banking system is in trouble? asked one intrepid news-persona. Which led to the remarkable answer from Bush of "I think the system basically is sound, I truly do." And an assurance: "That's one thing about this administration, we're not afraid of making tough decisions." No one tried to pin Bush down, no one tried to press him on his allegation that all current crises are the fault of the Democrats in Congress, who have had tenuous power for a year and a half, and not the nearly six years of barely checked and, starting in 2003, unchecked Republican power on all things financial.

Indeed, even when Bush outright lied, no reporter gave the barest shit. Asked about the status of Gitmo in wake of the Supreme Court's decision on allowing the detainees to challenge their detention, Bush said, "My view all along has been either send them back home, or give them a chance to have a day in court." The obvious question would have been, "Oh, c'mon, dude, seriously?" Or, more properly, "Then why did it take nearly three years before something that even looked like a mockery of justice took place for the prisoners there? And what do you consider a 'trial'?"

But not a single reporter could be bothered. Fuckin' christ, they couldn't even be bothered to try when Bush offered on Iraq and Afghanistan, "[I]t is a two-front war. And I say there's other fronts, but there's other fronts where we're taking covert actions, for example." The President of the United States just confirmed there's covert ops going on somewhere, and this was of no interest to reporters? (And, yes, of course everyone realizes that covert shit goes on all the time - but how often does the President confirm they're occurring?)

And don't even get them started on Pakistan. No. Really. Don't. 'Cause they won't.

Instead, we get this exchange:
Q Thank you, Mr. President. Good morning.

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you. It is a good morning.

Q It is.

THE PRESIDENT: Every day is a good morning when you get to serve the country.

Q Absolutely.

Helen Thomas must have wished she was dead so she could roll in her grave.

By this point, the Washington press corps knows the steps to the dance the White House wants them to do, prancing into a topic like Scott McClellan's book, knowing that it's going to be swatted back, and not pressing for fear of pissing Bush off. The reporters have finally just given up on this administration, which, if you think about it, was Bush's goal all along. That way, when Congress tries to investigate something, when some huge story about past and current crimes breaks, the weariness with which the media approaches the White House permeates any reporting.

And Bush and Cheney, et al, can finish the job under the cover of sweet, placid ignorance and complacency.

Note: The Rude Pundit is now in Red State America. He'll be driving to Austin tomorrow for the Netroots Nation conference, where he'll be a-paneling with Digby, Atrios, Amanda Marcotte, Jesse Taylor, and Kevin Drum. No, he's not going to be performing (but thanks for all the suggested places) because he didn't wanna put together some half-assed show. But he will be available for mucho beer.