We Haven't Even Begun to See the Destruction the GOP Will Do (Part 1):
One of the particularly repellent themes that's emerging strongly in the last days of this absurd election is that President Obama didn't do enough to "work with" Republicans. It's been something that the GOP has pushed for a while, but now, with the potential that the House will be given, wrapped in a ribbon, to the semen-encrusted, gnarled hands of the Republicans, more and more articles are coming out about how in the world Obama will work with the opposition.

As anyone in American with an attention span longer than an episode of Jersey Shore can tell you, this is, on its face, utter horseshit. We who have not handed our souls over to Sarah Palin or Fox "news" (which, you know, are pretty much one and the same) understand that the stimulus might have been much bigger and not larded with tax cuts; that the health care bill might not have been such a reacharound to hospitals and Big Pharma, so busy buggering us all endlessly; that there might have been a bipartisan climate bill; that confirmations of judges and administration officials might not have slowed to a near-halt had it not been for the White House's constant reaching out to Republicans. But that, apparently, wasn't enough. Cooperation and compromise are possible only if they include capitulation to Republican whims. All of them. And that bar you met? We're moving higher, motherfucker.

So Sheryl Gay Stolberg can write in the very liberal New York Times that it's all Obama's fault because he didn't stroke Mitch McConnell's anus while he was blowing the minority leader: "It took President Obama 18 months to invite the Senate Republican leader, Mitch McConnell, to the White House for a one-on-one chat." On a daily basis, McConnell was promising to filibuster everything that the President was proposing. Republicans negotiated in bad faith when they even bothered to negotiate at all. And yet: "Before Mr. Obama and Republicans can secure each other's cooperation, people in both parties say, they must first figure out a way to secure mutual trust."

That mutual trust took one hell of a hit when McConnell told National Journal, "The single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term president." You got that? Not jobs. Not the war. Not health care. Not education. Not immigration. Ah, the beautiful ship Bipartisan sails again.

And the Republicans are setting the tone already for a session of sunshine and hand holding. Here's Indiana's Mike Pence (Campaign slogan: "I'm a motherfucker, but at least I'm honest about being a motherfucker") on what will happen if his party wins the House: "Look, the time to go along and get along is over...Look, there will be no compromise on stopping runaway spending, deficits and debt. There will be no compromise on repealing Obamacare. There will be no compromise on stopping Democrats from growing government and raising taxes. And if I haven’t been clear enough yet, let me say again: No compromise."

So, yeah, awesome. Goddamn, it's about time that Barack Obama is forced to listen to those poor Republicans who have offered no ideas, given no ground, and stated that they will do everything possible to stop anything that the President wants, even if they happen to agree with it. In other words, if Republicans win one or both houses of Congress, it will be like King Kong has come to town. That giant ape is gonna run around and just shit on everything, on the Capitol, on the White House, on the Mall, shitting all over the place, because it's just easier to do that than to make the effort to climb, say, the Washington Monument and reach for the sky.