Briefly Noted: Unleash the Rumsfeld:
Donald Rumsfeld was tired of being chastened, whipped, and beaten. He was used to bitch slappin' the faces of uppity reporters and members of Congress in the halls of the Capitol, screeching, "I am Rumsfeld, and you are shit." He was kept on a short leash for a while, after the whole nightmare over whether or not it was ethically correct to have a machine sign letters telling parents, spouses, and children that their loved one in the armed forces was coming home in a nice, flag-draped casket.
But Rumsfeld had had enough, and this week he appeared before the House Armed Services Committee and the Senate Appropriations Committee to "discuss" the upcoming Pentagon budget(s). In his prepared remarks, Rumsfeld offered these stunning conclusions: "These are historic times. The Cold War has passed into history. The world and key institutions continue to require change.. .Terrorists have brains and use them. . . Our enemies are nimble and media savvy."
Then, when questioned, Rumsfeld, in essence, sneered at the members of the committees, Republicans and Democrats, and spat, "Fuck you, you fuckin' elected fuckwads, I only have to respond to one person, Bush, and he fuckin' begged me to stay on. I ain't tellin' you shit. Now, try to fuck with me." And then, over at the Senate side, he picked up Robert Byrd and started using him as a club to pound the crap out of Patrick Leahy while Ted Stevens screamed and wept and cowered in the corner. Rumsfeld turned to the Alaskan and said, "Don't worry your pussy - I ain't gonna touch ya. But if you head over to the House side, you'll find a pyramid of stacked corpses, all missin' their jugulars."
Ah, how sweet is unmitigated power.