Trump in a Battle to the Death (Our Deaths, Not His) with Science

The next governor who doesn't want Donald Trump to have one of his experimental virus incubator rallies should insist that they'll allow it on one condition: Trump has to descend from the podium and greet people. No fucking mask. No fucking gloves. He has to walk among the unwashed, untested, unsafe masses and inhale their stench and, possibly, their disease. That's it. You do that, motherfucker, and you go right on and encourage your followers to play death-virus roulette.

But he won't. And one big reason for that is because he knows. He fucking well knows that that's begging for his obese, high blood pressure, mini-stroked comorbidity-ridden ass to get COVID. He knows. That's the thing that's clear from Trump's conversations with Bob Woodward: he fucking knows that the science is right, just like he fucking knew that his charity was a scam and like he fucking knew that his fake-ass university was just another way to con the yokels desperate to get some of that grifter's glow to shine on them. He knew and he pretended otherwise. Did you ever drink his vodka? I did. It tasted like it was Putin's taint sweat filtered through Trump's diaper. But he lied about it endlessly, even charged a premium for it. It didn't matter that it was objectively terrible in an ugly bottle.

And here's the other thing someone should challenge Trump on: If he doesn't think climate change is real or something that requires action now, then he should stop trying to get a sea wall built for his Ireland golf resort. See, a consulting firm for the Trump Organization, in a 2016 application for permission to, yes, build the wall, "explicitly cites global warming and its consequences — increased erosion due to rising sea levels and extreme weather this century — as a chief justification for building the structure." Just this past March, the sea wall proposal was rejected by an Irish national planning board because it would fuck up the natural dunes near the resort.

See, the filthy fucking secret all along has been that Trump and, indeed, most conservatives don't believe the anti-science bullshit. They know climate change is real and happening. What they do believe is in exploiting the yahoos in order to get power to enrich themselves and their corporate masters. And the best way to get tax cuts for the wealthy is to get the masses you've made ignorant to vote their ignorance. So, sure, Skeeter, keep your guns and fuck the masks. Just make sure you vote for Mitch McConnell before you succumb to the 'rona.

(Note: Of course, there are completely delusional elected motherfuckers, like Louie Gohmert, whose brains said, "Yeah, fuck this. I'm outta here" a long time ago. And that growing contingent is the dragon burning the Republicans' village.)

So yesterday, when Trump sat with his dullard's stare at a roundtable in California to talk about the massive wildfires, he was told by that state's Secretary for Natural Resources, Wade Crowfoot, "You may have learned that we broke a world record in the Death Valley, 130 degrees, but even in greater LA, 120-plus degrees, and we’re seeing this warming trend make our summers warmer, but also our winters warmer as well."

That seems to be what Trump was responding to when he said, "Okay. It’ll start getting cooler," as if, no shit, we know winter is real. And when Crowfoot said, "I wish science agreed with you," Trump answered like a stubborn toddler who insists that there are monsters under the bed no matter how many times Mom checks, "Well, I don’t think science knows."

Science fucking knows. Science has known for a long time. Science probably did another shot from the fifth of cheap whiskey it was downing and yelled, "What the fuck do you know, motherfucker, huh?" Science has been falling asleep in a pool of its own vomit lately. Hard to blame it.

At his endless campaign speeches during his western jaunt, Trump mocked science at every turn. He laughed at Joe Biden having social distancing at his speeches: "Do you ever see him with his little circles? The circle? You know why he puts the circles? Because he wants to be like correct with COVID." Then he said it was really because Biden can't get anyone to go to his rallies, putting aside the fact that Biden hasn't held any big, open rallies since the country shutdown because he actually gives a fuck if people die. 

But I don't wanna give Trump too much credit for merely being duplicitous, for telling the public one thing while saying something else in private. It is equally likely that Trump's fucking dumb and said the shit he said to Woodward because that's the last thing someone told him before he picked up the phone. Besides, it doesn't matter what he really thinks. It doesn't matter what any of the Republican motherfuckers really believe because their actions show that they simply don't give a happy monkey fuck about us.

Several times in the last few days, Trump made the assertion that "You go to Europe and different places in Europe, countries where they’re forest countries, and they’re very, very strong on management and they don’t have a problem" and that places like Austria have "forest cities," like they're filled with goddamn Ewoks or something. Perhaps, but Europe has had really fucking bad fires for the last few years. It just so happens not to be as bad this year. But in 2017, 2018, and 2019, things sucked. Sweden had its worst year ever in 2018. Spain had a shit time last year. I know. I was fucking there, hearing the fire warnings, watching planes dropping chemicals over the burning areas. 

Even today, Trump would not answer a direct question about whether he believes climate change is a hoax, answering, "Well, I think you have people that don't want to address China." (By the way, China's seen an increase in wildfires, too. Man, we really need more forest rakers.)

All I can think is that Trump can't acknowledge that anyone has expertise other than him. To do so would puncture the godlike status he has with his idiot hordes. If you've got people out there who are forming vigilante blockades and staying to guard their belongings because they think Antifa is going to come into their fire-fucked town to loot their houses, and if you've got people practically rioting because they think wearing masks is an enormous, anti-freedom burden, something is seriously fucking haywire. 

Which is exactly what Trump and Republicans want.