Yeah, Conservative Jerks, We on the Left Did Have a Problem with Obama's Detention of Kids, But Trump's Far Worse

Let's get this out of the way: Except in rare cases, like suspected child trafficking or drug smuggling, migrant children were not separated from their families by the administration of Barack Obama. Our blithering cockknob president, Donald Trump, can insist, like a spoiled toddler in the ice cream section of Trader Joe's, that "President Obama separated the children.  Those cages that were shown — I think they were very inappropriate — they were built by President Obama’s administration, not by Trump.  President Obama had child separation.  Take a look.  The press knows it.  You know it.  We all know it.  I didn’t have — I’m the one that stopped it.  President Obama had child separation."

But that's a goddamn lie, and Trump can't jack it into being truth no matter how many times he yanks it. Shit, he went so far as to tweet out a Fox "news" video that showed reports on the detention of children in fenced-in centers during the Obama administration. And you know what? That shit's real. You got us.

Yup, the Obama administration did keep migrant children from Central America in large-scale detention centers, ones with metal fences and smaller, caged areas, in the United States, at Nogales, Arizona, among other places. But, and see if you can follow me here, you dumbass MAGA motherfuckers, the kids were traveling alone. They were unaccompanied minors. Obama's Border Patrol wasn't tearing families apart. It created places to house large numbers of children and women with children when immigration was surging in 2014. (And, hell, you idiots even missed that Obama's Secretary of Homeland Security thought the centers would be a "deterrent" to more children coming.)

Before you try yawping "Hypocrites!" at us in your barely human burble of noise that we might decipher as words, lemme correct you ahead of time. We on the left and those in the media had a big fuckin' problem with the treatment of the kids. The New York Times repeatedly editorialized on it.  Tons of news coverage went to the centers. That's why Fox "news" even has the footage it now shows to say, "See? The black guy did it" (when he totally wasn't doing the same thing). Hell, I wrote about it. There were many churches and charities willing to take in the kids and families. That's what should have happened.

Yet one of the things we were also writing about was how Republicans were being just complete motherfuckers about these kids and families fleeing violence in Honduras, Guatemala, and elsewhere. Yeah, we were saying to treat them with compassion and process their asylum claims. Republicans and their moron minions were threatening to bodily block buses of migrant children from getting into the United States.

The camps sucked. They were wrong, and we said so. And Obama thought it might make Republicans finally make some kind of deal on immigration. Obama's problem was always that he thought he was dealing with honorable humans when he was really dealing with the syphilitic whores and deranged weasel-fuckers of the GOP, and those craven cocks were only there to piss on anything Obama wanted.  Obama tried to get Republicans to devote more resources to processing people at the border and at ports of entry, but, well, Republicans.

We have the fucking receipts on this shit, man.  We have the 2011 Memorandum to ICE where it said that the agency "only has resources to remove approximately 400,000 aliens per year" so let's use those resources to go after the violent assholes, not families that have been here for decades. Oh, and, by the way, the policy also opposed "catch and release," that line Trump's used endlessly. The memo says they should also target those who only recently crossed illegally or violated visas and deport them "to avoid a return to the prior practice commonly and historically referred to as 'catch and release.'" Does that fuck up your nice little narrative?

Meanwhile, lumpish Trump is demanding that Border Patrol agents break the law to prevent migrants from entering, and he wants to go nutzoid on the family separation, the tears of children needed as the lube for his manic masturbation sessions, the only way he can forget what an impotent failure he is.

This utter contempt Trump has for desperate asylum seekers was on display today when he followed up his lie about Obama and family separation with "Once you don’t have it, that’s why you see many more people coming.  They’re coming like it’s a picnic because 'let’s go to Disneyland.'"

Yeah, we thought the Obama program was wrong and inhumane; at least he wanted to attempt compassion in the big picture. But this evil motherfucker in there now? Trump won't be happy until he can have armed goons shooting down at families from turrets in his bullshit wall.

And Stephen Miller will watch the videos of the massacres and giggle as he stitches together his newest skin suit.