George Bush, You Just Got Served:
Aww, yeah. It’s on now, motherfuckers, it's on now. Deciding that it was time to treat the Bush campaign like he treated whores in Saigon, John Kerry went to town on the President and the Swift Boat Vets for "Truth" in a speech yesterday to the International Association of Fire Fighters. In so many words, Kerry said, in essence, "Bitch, you talk smack about me, I'm gonna fuck you in the ass until you bleed. You wanna fuck with me? Don't send your attack poodles out - come at me like a man so I can turn you into the little bitch you are, you fuckin' deserter." Of course, nothing else Kerry said in that speech was reported, including promises to make up for the cuts in funding for new equipment that Bush has inflicted on fire fighters.

This has been a heady week for those who believe that Bush should be locked into his compound in Crawford for the rest of his life, forced to play cowboy until he actually develops a callous or two on his hands or until he learns to ride a friggin' bike. There's the Washington Post article that said one of the Swift Boat Vets is contradicting his official records from the war when he says there was no enemy fire on the day Kerry saved a fellow soldier. There's the New York Times article today that pretty much takes apart the whole group and its motives. And there's the delicious other tidbits, like the fact that the Iraqi soccer team, doing so well at the Olympics, is angry at being used as a tool by the Bush campaign, like the retiring GOP House Intelligence Committee Vice Chairman calling the Iraq war a "mess" that wasn't justified. Whee, what fun, what fun.

Of course, this morning, Fox "News" spent an hour on the Swift Boat Vets' ad, interviewing their leader, John O'Neill, about Kerry's criticism and the Times article, and asking him such fair and balanced questions as, "What's the truth?" Because, you know, the way to get at the truth is simple: you just ask the person being accused of lying what the truth is. During the "interview," the ad itself played repeatedly on the screen - one guesses to avoid being disturbed by the strange, evil grin and too-squinty eyes of blonde E.D. "Murdoch's Spoogebag #15" Hill. However, what was fascinating about the interview was the spin being given: that Kerry said the ads should be taken off the air (Kerry has not said that). And the question of the origins of the group - whether it was a Republican creation or not. What Kerry said was that the group was "funded" by Republicans, and even O'Neill admitted that they would not have been able to get their message out without that influx of cash. In other words, Bob Perry found a fringe group he thought would damage Kerry and help Bush and gave them oodles of money because otherwise they'd have been ignored. Fox's spin, however, was that Kerry accused the group of being created by Republicans.

But Kerry watched Dukakis get fucked by Lee Atwater and the Bushes, and he ain't gonna pretend he ain't bein' attacked. He watched Gore ignore all the lies being spouted about him and watched the media roll over and let its balls be licked by the Republicans. Kerry ain't gonna play that game. Ain’t gonna be no punk ass smile and wave and brush-off from Kerry – motherfucker is actin’ like the country’s at stake. And he ain’t gonna pretend that politics makes everything fair – he knows that he’s gotta answer the message, and he's gotta answer it by showin' he's got the biggest balls.

Karl Rove must be havin' a seance to get advice from the dessicated corpse of Lee Atwater on a break from its regular pitchfork sodomizings and shit-eating in hell. And what a pussy Bush is being, as Josh Marshall points out, not even letting his press Robocop answer a direct question about the ads. (By the way, scroll down for Josh learning a little from the Rude Pundit, talking about the "bitch slap" theory of political rhetoric.)

Man, it's gonna be a vicious, drunken bar fight to the finish, ain't it? Let's hope the electorate doesn't get hit in the eye by shards of glass from the broken bottles.