Fear of a Muslim Planet: Carson, Trump, and the Cowards of the Right

The Rude Pundit warned you. He told you repeatedly that Dr. Ben Carson is a fucking idiot, a self-aggrandizing buffoon whose hubristic reasoning for running for president is "I felt God's fingers on me." No, really, motherfucker said almost exactly that. So after admitting that he's getting finger-banged by an invisible sky wizard, Carson has the balls on Meet the Press to say that Muslims shouldn't be president because they don't have the same "values" as the rest of America.

How dimwitted and worthless is Carson's view? Here's what he said in a follow-up today: "Muslims feel that their religion is very much a part of your public life and what you do as a public official, and that’s inconsistent with our principles and our Constitution." Yet, in August, also on Meet the Press, Chuck Todd asked Carson if the Bible has authority over the Constitution. Carson's stumbling answer was "I think probably what you have to do is ask a very specific question about a specific passage of the Bible and a specific portion of the Constitution."

In other words, Carson thinks there are times when the Christian bible has authority over the Constitution. In otherer words, Carson feels that his religion is very much a part of his public life and what he'd do as a public official. Or, to put it simply, holy fuck, this guy is dumb. Why do people behave as if he's some kind of sage just because he talks nonsense in the placid tones of someone who stumbled out of an opium den?

All over the air this week, more so than in some others, people were going batshit over fear of some phantom, encroaching Muslimization of the United States, of the West, in general. Part of it is the refugee crisis going on between Syria and Europe, despite the fact that if Europe took in the millions of refugees, it would raise the Muslim population on the continent from 4% to 5%, roughly. Taking in 100,000 people here would effectively do nothing to raise the percentage of Muslims in America.

In the United States, we've reached the part of our confrontation with an enemy where reality isn't frightening anymore, so those who want everyone to be scared have to come up with phantom horrors. We saw it with the Soviet Union and Communism. The Soviets were almost never the existential threat they were made out to be, but especially in the post-Brezhnev era. Yet there was Ronald Reagan, telling us all to be terrified of the "Evil Empire," even as it was crumbling. That's how you get and keep power. That's how you turn into an enemy anyone who says, "Um, maybe we shouldn't be spending so much on defense."

In our war against, oh, hell, let's say violent, extremist Muslims, we're at the point where, chances are, shit's more or less done. Sure, there will still be small incidents here and there. But here, in the U.S., where the only "plots" to blow up something are started by bored FBI agents needing to justify a paycheck, we had our freak-out moment, we've lost our minds and stayed crazy, to a large extent, but, mostly, it's time to fuckin' move on to the next villain.

Instead, we get nutzoids on talk radio, online, on Fox "news," and in the Republican Party spewing endless bullshit about Muslims establishing a caliphate in Peoria or installing Sharia courts in Yonkers or some such shit. They all make bank on ensuring that they have a critical mass of American cowards ready to keep losing their goddamned minds whenever Omar al-Beardy shows up looking menacing. Of course, Donald Trump was asked by some numbnuts about "When can we get rid of 'em?" Of course, the numbnuts thinks Obama's Muslim. Of course, Donald Trump pandered to him. Pandering to stupid people is Trump's fuckin' bread and butter. Trump can be as tough as he likes to a threat that isn't real. It's easy: The Rude Pundit would kick Hitler's ass. Prove that he couldn't.

To admit that the threat is far less than Republicans tell us it is would be to admit that the Muslim president did his job and that the people under him are doing their jobs. It's way better to get all jittery and bugfuck insane about Muslim leaders than worry about real shit, like income inequality or, you know, Christians being assholes about the law and the Constitution.

The rule should be simple. Who the fuck cares what your religion is? As long as you aren't shoving your god in our faces, as long as you put the Constitution above your made-up beliefs, as long as you aren't judging people because they aren't Judeo-Christian (which, let's fuckin' face it, means "really fucking Christian, except I want people to think I'm good with the Jews"), then, fuck it, be president. But the second you start telling us that you need to do something because God-Jeebus-Allah told you to or your totally fictional book of faith said so, then you can go fuck yourself back to your house of worship and run a goddamn bake sale rather than have the existence of the world in your hands.

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