7/13/2011

The McConnell Debt Ceiling Cave Has a Bear Trap Inside It:
There's myriad ways to look at Mitch McConnell's Deal o' Last Resort that he proffered yesterday. All of them involve the phrase "Fuck it." There's "Fuck it. If Obama loves the debt ceiling so much, he can marry it." And there's "Fuck it. These crazy Tea Party motherfuckers aren't gonna be happy until we're all living in heavily-armed bomb shelters." And there's "Fuck it. I'm sick of negotiating." And on and on, all variations on "Just fuck it."

McConnell announced the plan after taking to the Senate floor to say, "Democrats suck monkey balls." He also said a bunch of nonsense about what he thinks "the American people" want without mentioning that one of the things we want, by a huge majority, is higher taxes on people making far more than most of us.

The McConnell plan goes something like this, according to really pissed-off conservatives: The Republicans in Congress will drop their pants and tell Obama he can fuck their asses if he wants. When he starts to fuck them, some of them will say, "No," but Obama will say, "Your lips say 'No,' but your legislative activities say, 'Yes'" and continue fucking. They'll try one more time to say, "No, really, c'mon, stop," but it won't be enough because everyone knows that this is just a Republican rape fantasy by the black man. The safe word is "override."

In Left World, while some have seen this as a cynical hate fuck of democracy, others have celebrated this as McConnell caving (just as those aforementioned right-wingers have exploded in anger over what they see as McConnell caving). They view it as an admission of failure, an understanding that the public is gonna blame the GOP if Social Security checks don't go out, the success of an epic bluff by the President on cutting entitlements, a demonstration that the rule of the teabaggers must be ended...you get the idea.

They're both right. And they're both wrong. It's possible for the McConnell exit strategy to be all those things and a trap for Democrats in Congress (not so much the President, who will be reelected against any of the numbskulls, lunatics, or bores the other side nominates). The proposal is really about Republicans holding onto the House and possibly gaining the Senate in 2012.

Look at this from the perspective of your average congressional Democrats. The President has the easy part: he just says every five months or so, "Hey, raise that shit." And it gets raised unless Congress stops him. So the Congress debates a "Resolution of Disapproval" for ten hours in each chamber. So, splitting it down the middle, that's ten hours of Democrats being forced to either back the President and say why they want more debt. Or saying that they disagree with the President and either voting to disapprove, and thus voting with Republicans, or explaining why they didn't vote to disapprove. Meanwhile, Republicans get to stay monolithic and clean in their message. And then it gets better on "Hey, raise that shit" parts 2 and 3, when Obama is forced to submit a list of unilateral fantasy cuts that tie Democrats into additional knots. And then, oh, fuck, yeah, that's why this is a big-ass bear trap and not a little badger one, Obama has to veto the resolution and there's another hour of debate.

Right now, GOP campaign ad writers are being fired because their work will be done for them. Just iMovie that shit and put it out on YouTube. Democrats better be ready to chew their legs off.

The Rude Pundit sees this as part and parcel of how McConnell and Boehner have governed. They take themselves out of the battle and merely stand on the sidelines, hurling Molotov cocktails while saying that their pathetic pyromania is leadership.

One other thing: because this doesn't just raise the debt ceiling $2.5 trillion in one fell swoop, it requires a certain amount of trust in the Republicans by the Obama administration. If they dick the President over, then we plunge once again into crisis. Those fuckers aren't worthy of that kind of trust. Why would you let the arsonists guard the gas stove?