Elizabeth Warren Tells Fox "News" to Go Fuck Itself with Roger Ailes's Femur

Fuck yeah, Senator Elizabeth Warren, who is running for president, just went to war with Fox "news." In a series of tweets, Warren told Fox to get the fuck away from her with this town hall bullshit. Apparently, Fox invited her to appear on their network of the damned and Sean Hannity, and she declined, explaining, "Fox News is a hate-for-profit racket that gives a megaphone to racists and conspiracists—it’s designed to turn us against each other, risking life and death consequences, to provide cover for the corruption that’s rotting our government and hollowing out our middle class."

Warren didn't stop there. Ever the professor, she tied Fox's white nationalist propaganda directly to the wallets of its owners and shareholders. "It’s all about dragging in ad money—big ad money," she says, and that a Democrat appearing on a town hall on the network gives cover to the sales team trying to tell skittish advertisers that Fox really, really is fair and balanced, despite the fact that it's so extravagantly biased that Goebbels would watch it and say, "Jesus fuck, tone it down a bit."

Then Warren brings it back to voters: "I won’t ask millions of Democratic primary voters to tune into an outlet that profits from racism and hate in order to see our candidates—especially when Fox will make even more money adding our valuable audience to their ratings numbers." She doesn't shit all over the Democrats who have already appeared at a Fox town hall - Bernie Sanders and Amy Klobuchar - but she sure as hell draws a big damn line in the sand.

"Fox News is welcome to come to my events just like any other outlet," Warren concludes. "But a Fox News town hall adds money to the hate-for-profit machine. To which I say: hard pass."

And I am so hard right now that I could jackhammer a hole in my wall.

It's about goddamn time one of the Democratic candidates stopped with this whole bullshit idea that they have to "reach" Fox "news" viewers. It turns Fox into the de facto spokesdicks for the mythical "White Working Class," a group that is so much more than Fox-infected assholes (and is also far, far bigger once you remove "white" from the name). And Warren's rejection of Fox turns a spotlight on the "news" network's efforts at stupiding their viewers with a nonstop fecal flow of fear and fuckery. Maybe Kirsten Gillibrand and Pete Buttigieg will back out of their scheduled appearances.

Essentially, Warren just declared war on Fox "news." She went far, far further than just declining the town hall. She went for the throat, naming evil where she sees evil. Warren dug up the rotted whale carcass of Roger Ailes, ripped out his femur, and started fucking Tucker Carlson's ass with it.

Look for Fox to react furiously, as Fox will do, likely calling her everything from "Pocahontas" to "Emma Goldman" (actually, Emma Goldman doesn't have a Disney cartoon, so Fox viewers wouldn't understand it). They'll make her seem like Stalin has been reincarnated and that Warren and AOC are gonna be forcing you to eat organic dirt to stay alive while Rashida Tlaib ululates in your ears.

But Warren wouldn't have started this if she didn't know what she was getting into.  She could have politely declined and moved on. This is a war she wants. This shows she knows that you have to kill the troll if you want everyone to be able to cross the bridge.