C'mon, Drag Queens, Let's Go Fuck With Some Churches

Tell you what: I wanna gather a whole buncha drag queens from different places around the country, from Tennessee and Oklahoma and Florida and Kansas and every state where knuckle-dragging Nazi and Christian extremist fucknuts are shutting down events and protesting them and getting shit canceled, all because someone in drag is involved. And while the fucknuts say they are protecting children, it doesn't even matter anymore if the events allow children to be present. They're after the drag performers because they say drag is grooming kids for...I don't fuckin' know, man...fabulousness? The fucknuts say that this is about sexualizing children and confusing them and making them gay or some such bullshit that really comes down to "I'm an ignoramus and everyone should listen to me because I'm too stupid to learn different shit."

All the drag performers should protest outside places of worship where a church leader has actually been arrested for sex crimes. Because, lemme tell you, there are a fuckton more child-fucking and rapist preachers and priests and pastors than drag queens. But the Proud Boys and the Jesus Fellaters don't get on the sidewalk outside those churches and scream about grooming and God hating them. Or maybe it's just not really about the sexual assault and pedophilia and it's just about hating LGBTQ people. (It's totally just about the hate.)

You wanna go on this, you masturbation-denying freaks who are so backed up with jizz that you can't see straight? Then let's go:

C'mon, drag queens. Let's go fuck with the Pleasant Grove Missionary Baptist Church in Fairfield, Illinois. Yeah, their former pastor, the uncomfortably-named Garrett Biggerstaff, was arrested last month on two counts of grooming children for sexual activity. He'd been at it for a while, literally an alleged groomer.  So let's line up outside with signs that say, "Wake up! This is child abuse!" and "Groomers" with a big red X through it. (Real signs outside drag events, in case you were wondering.)

Or maybe we should head to Jamestown, North Dakota, where a Catholic priest, Neil Pfifer, has been arrested for sexually assaulting someone he was supposedly providing mental health services for. Oh, and "an investigation uncovered accusations of crimes in other jurisdictions." Yup. Another priest just moved around because he kept raping his parishioners. Every single person who ever attended a service led by Pfifer was safer with a group of drag queens, as we all would be all the time. So let's show up in our best bustiers and heels and Spanx and ask everyone who goes in if they're ok having given money to house and feed a rapist. 

We could go all around the country doing this, a tour of strong motherfuckers in drag daring the liars and fanatics and fascists to tell us we're wrong. If they confront us, we'll ask them if they're ok with the middle school teacher at the First Apostolic Church in Maryville, Tennessee, who was arrested for sexually assaulting a minor; or with the youth pastor at Harbor Baptist Church in Hainesville, NJ, who pretended to be a teenage girl online in order to get young teen boys to send sexual photos of themselves; or the pastor at Ridge Church in Black Mountain, North Carolina; or the pastor in Florida; or the one in Ohio; or just about anywhere in the country. The list is fucking endless and awful.

Yeah, c'mon, bad ass drag queens. You wanna really highlight who is harming the kids? Who is raping and sexually assaulting and molesting and grooming? Let's fuck shit up outside all these houses of worship and then sashay away.