Right-Wing Media Wants Obama to Surrender to Election Results, Unlike What It Asked of GOP in 2012

Let's face it: Yesterday, President Barack Obama could have invited John Boehner and Mitch McConnell to his press conference, announced that he received the message from the election, got on his knees in front of the Speaker and the incoming Majority Leader, unzipped their flies, took out their dicks, and sucked them and jacked them off, and all the right-wing media would have talked about is how arrogant he was not to let them fuck his ass. "Is Obama's asshole too good for cock?" they would have tweeted mightily. "Obama didn't lick their balls, so that must indicate he is anti-Tea Party," others would have conspiracy theorized. And, honestly, this ain't that far from what they really said.

It was a "surly stew of delusions and insults," according to some fuckin' writer at Redstate that's not Erick "Erick" Erickson, although he flipped the fuck out on Twitter over "petulant man child" Obama. So it was all over Right Blogsylvania. But even Chris Matthews on MSNBIrrelevant said he found Obama to be overreaching. Why? Because Obama said he is going to do things, using executive power if he has to. Oh, and that he believes in different things. Mostly, it's because he didn't surrender and say, "Fine. Here's my anus. Go to town."

Now, ordinarily, this would be time to trot out quotes from the press conference that demonstrate that  Obama mostly talked about finding areas of common ground with the GOP. It's be easy: "Let’s compare notes in terms of what I’m looking at and what they’re looking at, and let’s get started on those things where we agree. Even if we don’t agree 100 percent, let’s get started on those things where we agree 70, 80, 90 percent." There's a ton of that shit in the press conference. But that pierces the delusion that Obama is the uppity Negro who won't sit in the back of the bus while the white folks drive.

Instead of begging you to listen to Obama, instead of convincing you that, even now, he should have been more arrogant, he should have just said, "Kiss my ass and try to stop me," instead of wasting your time with that, let's do this. Here's Erick "Erick" Erickson right after the 2012 election, when Democrats had a goof night: "So what should Republicans do? Fight on. Don’t listen to those who say we must moderate, we must abandon values, we must abandon principles, etc. They are wrong. We must reach out, but that does not mean surrender." Does that sound like capitulation? Does that sound like giving in to the will of the voters? No. It's "Fuck the majority of Americans. Fuck them hard."

In fact, a group of activists signed a letter to congressional Republicans urging them not to cooperate with the reelected President and the Democrats: "Their entire leftist agenda opposes the principles on which you ran and the principles of the millions of people who elected Republicans to Congress. And now we count on you to stop them. Nobody else can stop them but you. You have the power, if you will use it."

There was not a second in 2012 when the people who are now calling Obama a jerk expressed any sentiment about Republicans working with the twice-elected president. It didn't matter that he won majorities of the nation twice. There were Republicans who voted otherwise. They mattered. Everyone else didn't. So Republicans didn't do shit to work with the White House. And now they're upset because Obama might not play nice with them? If you don't understand where Obama is coming from, that's your brain damage, man.

Mitch McConnell had a press conference yesterday, too. He was conciliatory, as a seasoned politician would be in victory. The only difference between McConnell and Obama was that McConnell was lying every time he moved his barely-existing lips. They're not gonna work with Obama. They're gonna keep doing the same shit they've been doing, just with a majority instead of a filibustering minority.

After McConnell spoke, media commenters across the intellectual spectrum, from NPR to Fox "news," talked about how we might move past gridlock now. It's as if someone kicked them in the head so they'd forget who the fuck locked it up for the last four years.

(Side note: Props to Erickson. He predicted in 2012 that Obama's base wouldn't vote in 2014 and it would be a runaway for Republicans. The Rude Pundit may disagree with Erickson totally, he may despise Erickson as a human being, but he will admit when someone is right.)