12/26/2014

End of Year Housekeeping: More Joyful Shit and Some Motherfuckin' Haiku

1. Holy shit, the Rude Pundit can't believe he left out some of his favorite stuff from this past year when he was writing about, well, hell, his favorite stuff from this past year. Like Rick and Morty, the animated show by Justin Roiland and Dan Harmon, which was alternately fucked-up and poignant, sometimes both at once, as when Morty, the grandson of the mad, dimension-leaping, alcoholic scientist, Rick, buries a dead version of himself so he can take his place back in his family.

Or like Beck in concert, the first time the Rude Pundit's seen him live since the Odelay days. Playing guitar again like a boss after a long, painful recovery from spinal surgery, Beck didn't dwell in his mellow, beautiful new album. Instead, it was an old-school dance party, with Beck breaking into "Billie Jean" at one point. And he played "Debra," which brought the Rude Pundit no end of boogie-down bliss. What else? The film Nightcrawler? Thao with the Get Down Stay Down live? New Girl getting even funnier? The play Dry Land? Okay, moving on...

2. It's that time of year around this here bloggy parts. Every year, the Rude Pundit doesn't sit there and pen some naval-gazing bullshit about what roughly sucked balls and what gave a delicious hummer this year. Instead, he kicks the poetry jams with some haiku as a sharp needle to poke into the brain about the last dozen months. Like:

CNN's Lemon
Wondered, "Do black holes suck planes?"
Dumb anchor physics.

You see how that goes? Five syllables in one line, seven in the next, five in the last one. That's it.

So starting on Monday, the Rude Pundit will post some and then he invites you, the devoted and/or perverse rude reader, to contribute your own. The rules are simple: Real haiku (not some half-assed limerick) and a subject from this year.

Using his superhuman abilities to judge everything, the Rude Pundit will choose the best to be published on the blog. Your prize? Um, you get published on the blog. What the fuck else do you want?

Just in case that great honor is bestowed on you, give the name you want with it and a place (city or state or country, however vague you'd like to be). Like "Jennifer in Thailand" or "CockMonger in Poughkeepsie." (The Rude Pundit will Skype both of you today.)

And email 'em to rudepundit_at_yahoo.com.