I'm not gonna pretend to understand all the financial shenanigans detailed in Manhattan Supreme Court Judge Arthur Engoron's decision in the civil fraud trial against noted rapist Donald Trump and his stupid company. But I do know a bitch-slapping when I see one, and, to my reading sensibilities, Engoron has his bitch-slapping gloves on and his knuckles cracked and he's getting down to the business of slapping some bitches.
Check out how he describes Trump Organization CFO Allen Weisselberg as a pathetic little lapdog: "[H]is testimony in this trial was intentionally evasive, with large gaps of 'I don't remember.' He conceded that his Separation Agreement, on which he is still apparently awaiting four payments, prohibits him from voluntarily cooperating with any entity adverse to the Trump Organization or its former or current employees. That alone renders his testimony highly unreliable. The Trump Organization keeps Weisselberg on a short leash, and it shows." Weisselberg was still waiting to get paid his full severance from a man who notoriously cheaps out on his debts (but now Weisselberg not only won't get it, he has to pay back what he already got). Engoron goes further in enbitchifying Weisselberg, adding, "As CFO, Weisselberg oversaw the Trump Organization's accounting department, although he was not a certified public accountant (CPA) and did not know any components of GAAP." That last thing there is "Generally Accepted Accounting Principles." In other words, Weisselberg doesn't know shit about shit and is only there to cover up all the criming.
While there are jabs at Eric and Donald Trump, Jr., Engoron obviously wants to tear apart the myth that Trump created around his wealth. Here's the judge on one property that the rapist/former president ludicrously overvalued: "Donald Trump insisted that he believed Mar- a-Lago is worth 'between a billion and a billion five today,' which would require not only valuing it as a private residence, which the deed prohibits, but as more than the most expensive private residence listed in the country by approximately 400%." A footnote links to a goddamn palace in Los Angeles (where property is a little pricier than in Swampy Nutrot, Florida) that's really the most expensive house, listed at $290 million. Fun fact: it was on the market because its owner/builder couldn't afford it and went bankrupt. It sold for just $141 million, so, yeah, hubris and lies will fuck you every time.
Later in the decision, Engoron states flatly, "There can be no mistake that Donald Trump's valuation of Mar-a-Lago from 2011-2021 was fraudulent." It doesn't get any clearer.
But Engoron was just getting warmed up with the bitch-slapping of Trump, who, to be fair, should have had someone on staff to bitch-slap him daily. After giving examples of Trump's bullshitting (like lying about how many stories one of his buildings is or defending his failure to live up to an agreement on Mar-a-Lago not being a single residence with "when you say, 'intend,' intend doesn't mean we will do it"), Engoron summarizes Trump's testimony with something that ought to be the equivalent of the Special Counsel report saying that Biden is forgetful: "Overall, Donald Trump rarely responded to the questions asked, and he frequently interjected long, irrelevant speeches on issues far beyond the scope of the trial. His refusal to answer the questions directly, or in some cases, at all, severely compromised his credibility." There it is: the former president and adjudicated rapist isn't credible. You can't trust the motherfucker.
Compare that to Engoron's insights on former Trump fixer Michael Cohen: "Although the animosity between the witness and the defendant is palpable, providing Cohen with an incentive to lie, the Court found his testimony credible, based on the relaxed manner in which he testified, the general plausibility ofhis statements, and, most importantly, the way his testimony was corroborated by other trial evidence. A less-forgiving factfinder might have concluded differently, might not have believed a single word of a convicted perjurer. This factfinder does not believe that pleading guilty to perjury means that you can never tell the truth . Michael Cohen told the truth." Goddamn, that's a kick right in Trump's voluminous ass: the guy who went to prison because he was covering up for Trump is now more credible than his ex-boss.
In his conclusions, Engoron lets it all loose, all the anger he had to have from this prissy little wannabe mobster prancing in and out of his courtroom, pretending to be a pugilist when he was really just a punk. I mean, look at this pantsing: "Donald Trump was aware of many of the key facts underpinning various material fraudulent misstatements in the SFCs [statements of financial condition]: he was aware of having deeded away the right to use Mar-a- Lago as anything other than a social club, and notwithstanding, continued to value it as if it could be used as a single family residence ; he was aware that the Triplex apartment in which he, a real estate mogul and self-identified expert, resided for decades was not 30,000 square feet, but actually 10,996 square feet...he was aware that he had permission to build only 500 private residences in Aberdeen, notwithstanding that he represented that he had permission for 2500; and he was aware that 40 Wall Street was operating at a deficit despite proclaiming that it was running a net operating income of $64 million. As Eric Trump testified, Donald Trump sat at the top of the pyramid of the Trump Organization until 2017. Donald Trump professed to know more about real estate than other people and to be more expert than anybody else. He repeatedly falsified business records with the intent to defraud."
That's a fucking reality check right there. It's a list of lies from which Trump benefited financially, as well as a way of telling Trump that he can't pretend that his fantasy world is the truth. To that end, Engoron, towards the end, even expresses his disbelief in the delusions that Trump and his shitty family and shitty employees, co-conspirators all, keep professing to believe in the face of demonstrable facts: "Their complete lack of contrition and remorse borders on pathological . They are accused only of inflating asset values to make more money. The documents prove this over and over again. This is a venial sin, not a mortal sin . Defendants did not commit murder or arson. They did not rob a bank at gunpoint. Donald Trump is not Bernard Madoff. Yet, defendants are incapable of admitting the error of their ways...Indeed, Donald Trump testified that, even today, he does not believe the Trump Organization needed to make any changes based on the facts that came out during this trial." So, yeah, Engoron says, we need to act like these skeevy fucks are just gonna do it all again. Hence his heavy financial penalty and other restrictions, including an independent monitor with the ability to shut the whole operation down.
I mean, really, though, it's not fair to compare Trump to Madoff. Madoff at least pretended to apologize and take responsibility for his crimes. The final bitch slap here, though, is what Engoron is implying: if Trump had just admitted that he was fucking with the numbers and took some lumps for it, there's a good chance he would have had just a few mild fines and not the wealth-depleting decision here. But that egotistical orange rapist can't ever be told he's wrong, so, in the end, he bitch-slapped himself to the tune of a half-billion bucks.
