When the Amway Center opened at last, they sweated even more profusely in anticipation. What would happen? Would they get to break out the hits, the "Lock her up" and the "Build the wall" and more? Would they be allowed to catch a glimpse of Trump's cheap Eastern European substitute for Jackie Kennedy? Would Eric be there? Don, Jr? Might this be a rare Ivanka sighting?
The crowd went insane when a giant papier-mache' bald eagle, legs spread wide, claws holding only arrows, was lowered to the stage. Then it dawned on them that they were looking right at the eagle's pussy. "Do eagles have pussies?" they wondered and went onto their smarter phones to find out. But they didn't have time because, all of a sudden, two tiny hands emerged and grabbed the eagle's pussy. Donald Trump slowly, with some assistance, emerged, birthed onto the stage by the symbol of America. And he was dressed in professional wrestler spandex, red, white, blue, stars, stripes, the whole flag as "God Bless the USA" surged through the speakers, so loud that some ears began to bleed, but their owners didn't care. Bleed away, for God, for country.
"The American Dream is back," Trump announced, gesturing at his grotesquely padded groin. "It's bigger and better, and stronger than ever before. 2016 was not merely another four-year election. This was a defining moment in American history." Then he did a pro wrestler walk around the stage, arms up, soaking in the heaving, frothing love from the surging crowd. He gestured upward at a cage suspended above him. It held several dolls that looked like Central American migrants. "Now bring me the alligator," he said.
Two Secret Service agents came out with a large, lethargic, likely drugged alligator. They put it on the ground and stood guard with guns ready as Trump shooed them back. If it was possible, the people in the crowd went even crazier, recognizing the state sport of Florida. They tore their clothes and clawed their faces in ecstasy. The president of the United States flopped onto the alligator and rolled around with him for a little while before getting on the creature's back, pulling its head back, and putting his chin out with the alligator's upturned head held behind his chin, as one does. In that position, Trump cried out, "Many times I said, 'We would drain the swamp.' And that's exactly what we're doing right now, we're draining the swamp. And that's why the swamp is fighting back so viciously and violently." He stood up and waved at the agents to take the alligator away.
He did another winner's triumphant walk around the stage and then a man without a shirt who was wearing a Barack Obama mask came out. His obviously white skin had been half-ass coated with brown makeup, and he wore a sash that said, "Kenya's #1 son" on it. He danced around a little, shucking and jiving, doing a proper Jim Crow jig for the laughing, hooting crowd. Then he acted like he was going to wrestle Trump. But Trump had other ideas.
Once again, the Secret Service agents came out, and they handed Trump a long bullwhip. The Obama-masked man realized what was happening and tried to get away, but he was held steady by the agents. Obviously panicking, he pulled off the mask to reveal that he was Chief of Staff Mick Mulvaney, a white man, and there was silence. Trump smirked at the crowd and gestured for them to put the Obama mask back on him, which made the crowd so much more comfortable.
As he unfurled the whip, Trump said, "Remember, President Obama's famous line caught on the open mic, secretly telling the Russian president to quote, 'Inform Vladimir that after my election I'll have more flexibility.' Okay. Remember that?" And he whipped Mulvaney/Obama's back, and the audience lost their goddamn minds with shouts and screams. "Remember that?" he repeated. And he whipped again, with Obama's cries just making Trump's supporters practically orgasmic. The Proud Boys could be seen openly weeping in joy. "Lot of people remember that, I remembered it." Whip. "I saw it happen." Whip. "I didn't like it." Whip. Welted up and slumped over, the sweat and blood washing the brown off his skin, Trump nodded and Mulvaney/Obama was taken off stage.
When the person in a pants suit and a Hillary Clinton mask came out, people wondered who it might be. Now, finally, there might be some actual wrestling because Hillary got into a wrestler's pose. Trump waddled over to Hillary and turned to the crowd to say, "The only collusion was committed by the Democrats, the fake news media and their operatives and the people who funded the phony dossier, crooked Hillary Clinton and the DNC" before picking up Hillary and body slamming her onto the stage. To be fair to Hillary, it looked like she did most of the work. But it still seemed to honestly stun her. The mask slipped a bit and white hair peeked through. Obviously, it was Vice President Mike Pence.
Then he adjusted and became Hillary again, shaking her finger at Trump, facing off against her 2016 nemesis who refused to let go of his victory. Trump went on the attack again, knocking Hillary to the floor saying, ""If you want to know how the system is rigged, just compare how they came after us for three years with everything they had, versus the free pass they gave to Hillary and her aides after they set up an illegal server," Trump started to smash Hillary's head against the floor again and again. "Destroyed evidence, deleted, and acid washed 33,000 e-mails." You could hear Pence's raspy, weak voice shout, "Mother!" as if it was a safe word.
No safety would be found for Pence or his Hillary because, goddamnit, it was Trump's rally.
Slowly crawling to get off the stage, Trump pulled Pence/Hillary back, pulled down the white pants, shoved down his tights, and, just before thrusting his dick into Pence's ass (for, indeed, he may have been wearing a Hillary mask, but it was Mike Pence's ass), he said, "They called us deplorables, that was a mistake. That was a big mistake. I'll never forget. I was making a speech after Hillary used the word deplorables, and I didn't think it was that bad, you know why? She used another word. You know what the other word was?" Then, plunged in, Pence confused and, from one angle, aroused, Trump yelled, "She said, deplorables and irredeemables. I think that was worse!" as he pumped and pumped, his orange face now a deep crimson.
By this point, the entire Amway Center had become a giant fuck fest, with bellies slapping against asses and fingers in pussies and sphincters and faces buried in cock. The children there were told to watch, that this is what the real America is, that this is how real Americans behave, that women should be raped and black men should be beaten and refugees should be caged and, hey, where are the queers, we should get them, too, and, goddamnit, don't you want this America to be the America you inherit? No, don't fuckin' talk to us about climate change and how the streets of Florida towns flood every high tide. That shit's not real. You want Trump's America where reality is a myth and myth is reality and you can fuck your daughter if she's hot.
Of course, Trump came first. And then he stood up and watched, pleased at the undulating pile of white asses and the scent of cum and juices and sweat. To keep them going, he took the microphone and cried out, "Our radical Democrat opponents are driven by hatred, prejudice, and rage. They want to destroy you and they want to destroy our country, as we know it. Not acceptable, it's not going to happen. It's not going to happen." The cage opened and the migrant dolls fell onto the stage, with an uncomfortably loud and convincing thud as Trump kicked them off the edge.
Then, as the mass of fucking, barely distinguishable human bodies started to disentangle, Trump cooed, "We have been blessed by God with the greatest nation on the face of the earth and we are going to keep it that way. We are going to keep it that way." Then he grabbed the eagle by the pussy again and exited through it.
After the speech, the news media rolled their eyes and laughed, saying it was just Trump being Trump and that Democrats should think about how to win over those voters.
