Blithering idiot Gov. Rick "These Poindexter Glasses Sure Make Me Look Smarter Than I Am, Buddy" Perry was indicted for abuse of power for line-item vetoing the budget of the state's public integrity office because...you know, really, who the fuck cares, right? It's a veto. If he was doing something so outrageous, then his toady legislature should be able to override it, no? And if not, then if the public gives a flying fuck, it would vote in new legislators or something. Fuck if anyone knows how democracy works anymore, especially in Texas.
Anyways, the easy thing to do for liberals and Democrats would have been to pile on, to jump on the felony charges (which included the smarmiest mug shot this side of Tom DeLay's gap teeth) and ride Perry with all the vigor of a Bushwick leather stud breaking in a Westchester twink. Yeah, it'd be really nice to just say, "Yeah, fuck that guy. Whatever he gets, he deserves."
But we're not like that. Oh, no. We have a conscience, goddamnit. We believe in right and wrong (real and actual right and wrong, not fake shit like Benghazi or IRS scandals or Oval Office blow jobs). And fuck if we don't say it: This Perry indictment is kind of nonsense. Sure, some Democrats have used it as a horsewhip to maim Perry's ass. But that's different from a full-on blitz.
'Cause, see, if Perry were a Democrat, every goddamn Republican would have been on every goddamn cable news gabfest, all repeating the roundelay of condemnation. There would have been calls for investigations, special prosecutors, anal probes, and blood samples. Darrell Issa would have already subpoenaed everyone who ever knew Perry. It would have become the newest way that the GOP would have raised money.
How do we know? Because, despite a Republican-led House Intelligence Committee report saying that the Obama administration did not do a goddamn thing wrong on the Benghazi attack, the House GOP's website says that the "investigation" by the "select committee" is going to get to the true truth, not the bullshit truth its own committee got to that wasn't the truth they wanted.
Over here in Leftville, we give a damn about things like reality. And we call "bullshit" when we see it. Over there? "Truth" is an ephemeral concept, so much dust, so much noise.
Meanwhile, in the Senate, should Republicans win a majority there, Mitch McConnell is already planning on how he will shut down the government if President Obama doesn't accede to all their demands. Man, while we're arresting fuckwads and suing people, can we get congressional Republicans for malpractice?
