"Hot Chicks Dig Obama": Blame the Impotence:
Oh, sweet readers, beware the impotent straight man. For, indeed, the man who has suffered the indelible shame of "it's okay" from a sighing nude or semi-nude woman as a response to his pronounced penile flaccidity will have a rage ignited inside of him. And that fire inside due to a lack of tumescence, a denial of rigidity, a floppy cock shall evince itself in numerous ways, none of them terribly complex. Most men will turn inward, falling into an abyss of self-loathing and depression, maybe compensating by working harder, drinking more, or, most sadly, trying and failing again and again to get hard and breach the decreasingly lubricated walls of his lover's fortress of pleasure, thus perpetuating the spiral into the aforementioned abyss.

However, the impotent man may also turn outward once he fails in the bedroom, living room, or bar bathroom stall. He may decide that the rest of the world must suffer for his peter's arrested stiffness. And then, merciful fuck, how he will lash out. In general at all around him, and specifically and especially against those he perceives are balling women with ease. Some men's whole lives are built around punishing others for their personal failings. Whole civilizations have fallen and entire peoples enslaved or murdered just because some dude in power couldn't get his dick up.

Thus we have John McCain's latest web ad, "The Fan Club." In it, McCain again goes after Barack Obama for the horrible sin of being liked. Oh, and the ad, as usual, blatantly lies and/or misrepresents Obama's actual plans. But the main point of the ad seems to be that white women wanna fuck Obama. Hell, it's even got a guy jealously spouting, "Hot chicks dig Obama." And, to reiterate, the ad only shows white chicks of varying degrees of hotness, one of whom talks about his "dreamy eyes." While the Paris/Britney ad might not have been blatantly race-related, you'd be an idiot to miss the implications here.

So this is where the campaign of John McCain is in August: it's using apocalyptic imagery befitting a 700 Club commercial on the Antichrist in its ad declaring Obama "the One" (a title that is re-asserted in this ad), and now it's preying on one of the most rank prejudices, that black men might ball your white women (or, in this case, vice versa), the irrational fear that led to that pleasant aspect of lynchings - castration. The ad is ostensibly about how shallowly popular Obama's support is, but, really, and c'mon, it's about the threat of interracial fucking.

Is that going too far? Please. It's August. With this rapid progression of disgust, by October, the McCain campaign will be releasing ads with a digital Obama using his giant cock to rape JonBenet Ramsey's corpse.

The Rude Pundit's got a friend who believes the McCain campaign, by appealing to the basest of the base, the nutzoid racists and endtimers who pollute the nation, is trying to bring out the crazies not just to vote for McCain, but to kill Obama. As in assassinate. This friend believes that it's the conscious strategy of the Rovean activists in McCain's camp. And while the Rude Pundit isn't ready to go that far, he does think that, as with the ads, it's a frighteningly logical progression of Republican electoral tactics. Also, he believes that, barring a real scandal, it's about the only way that McCain has a chance in November. (Note to those who write to the Rude Pundit questioning his "optimism" about the election: Wait for September and the debates. Then see who's right.)

At some point, Obama's gonna have to get in the gutter and take real swings at McCain. Just so that he goes into office demonstrating that he's not gonna knuckle under to this kind of bullshit, he's gonna have to beat up an old man.

(For more on what impotence does to right-wing politicians in particular, see George W. Bush's brief words on the situation between Russia and Georgia.)