So...many...haiku. Rude readers have been in a poetry-writing mood, like angry teens whose parents make them take a phone timeout. You have sent in upwards of 200 haiku. It's almost as if you have something you need to get off your chests, like you wanna just scream, "Fuck off, 2017!" except in three lines of 5 syllables, then 7, then 5 again. I just fuckin' love how smart these are. Hell, at this point, I'm just gratified when people use the correct "there," "their," or "they're."
Here are a few more of the best ones:
From Jody in Washington:
Move in like a bitch
Pink Pussy hat on my head
Grab my country back
From Dave from Ann Arbor:
I learned as a boy
Harassment is not okay
Not a hard concept
From VJ in NJ:
"What is the dick move?”
Trump thinks as he sips his Coke
President Asshole
From Alex in Pittsburgh:
The Oval Office
Smells like somebody fucked it
Can't imagine why
From Tom in Tuscon:
Ninety-two million
To subsidize his golf game
In one fucking year.
From RJ in San Jose:
When Trickle-Down fails
again, Trumpsters will bravely
condemn Kaepernick.
From Wendy:
How do you do it?
What lies do you tell yourself?
You are in a cult
From Steve in San Diego:
Skinny polar bear
Now ice free Arctic summer
Make way for the drills
From Sister of Ye in Michigan:
"See, I saved Christmas,"
Trumpy Grinch said as he threw
Christ off Mt. Crumpit
And while I generally hate this kind of shit, this one made me giggle:
From Adam in South Carolina:
One day I googled
Why Ann Coulter is a cunt
Then I found this blog
There are a ton more, and I'll post some tomorrow as we tell send this goddamn year into the trash heap. You can still send yours to "rudepundit" at the ol' Yahoo.
Thanks to everyone who has submitted so far. One more today from me.
Come November 2018
Channel all of that
Rage and energy into
Election grenades