2/28/2005

Let's Hear It For the Rainbow Tour:
The Rude Pundit's been reading over the transcript of the discussion of "U.S.-Russian Partnership" between Presidents Bush and Putin last week, and he's decided that Bush is a master of elliptical bullshit. Check this out, and you see if you can discern anything that remotely resembles a concrete idea or fully-developed thought that relates to a question on concerns over Putin's "commitment to democracy" (which, let's face it, is about the same as a pants-down, cock up high school quarterback's commitment to the skirt up, panties down cheerleader straddling him in the back of his parents' Saturn):

"There was no doubt in my mind what his position was on Iraq. He didn't kind of hedge, he didn't try to cloud up the issue. He made it abundantly clear to me that he didn't agree with my decision. And that's an important part of having a trustworthy relationship, a relationship where, when a person tells you something, you know he means what he says, and, 'yes' means yes, and 'no' means no. Sometimes in politics yes means 'maybe,' and no means 'if.' This is the kind of fellow who, when he says, yes, he means, yes, and when he says, no, he means, no."

Just to be clear here, 'cause, you know, we who exist outside of the Beltway, which would be most of us, may not be up on the lingo of realpolitick and some such crap, but for the record, when Putin says, "Yes," he means, "Yes." Damn, it's a good thing Putin's not a flip-flopper, you know. The solipsistic way Bush talks bespeaks a man who simply doesn't care if he says anything as long as he knows what he's saying, which, really, isn't anything in particular.

Of course, throughout Bush's amazing adventure of demonstrating that oceans can't stop him from traveling to Europe, he spoke in definite terms that defined nothing definite except how indefinite his definition of "definite" definitely is. For instance, in his "roundtable" with a pre-screened audience of German "Young Professionals," Bush said, in answer to an approved question about Russia and dependency on oil resources, "For years, there was this sense that we could tolerate tyranny for the sake of energy. And yet, beneath the surface of that policy lurked this hatred and feeling of oppression and frustration and hopelessness, which lent itself to an ideology of hatred that ended up manifesting their hatred on America." Now, without getting into the oh-really-now-who-do-you-think-helped-tolerate-that-policy bullshit of Cheney and all the loverly Bushes, what the fuck do those two sentences mean? No, seriously, and, c'mon, what they fuck does that mean? Who is hating who? And, once again, is Bush saying it is our "job" to rout out tyranny wherever it may hide? Where the fuck is the Justice League of America when you need it?

Bush then brought it on home by saying that everything the U.S. does in its foreign policy is related to 9/11: "Let me say something about September the 11th. I think this will help frame the conversation as we go forward. For some, September the 11th was a passing moment in history. In other words, it was a terrible moment, but it passes. For me, and my government, and many in the United States, it permanently changed our outlook on the world. Those two attitudes caused us, sometimes, to talk past each other, and I plead guilty at times. But as this conversation goes on, I want you to remember that point of view." One assumes that the "two attitudes" are the United States's position that "We don't give a fuck what Europe or anyone else has to say in opposition to us; we're gonna do whatever the fuck we want; we shit on our treaties" and those who have the position of "Why the fuck should we roll over and allow you to make the world into your image?"

Oh, and then Bush said, again, that we're gonna build more nuclear power plants "because I think it is a way for the United States to be less dependent on foreign sources of energy, which is good for our economy, and, frankly, helps us with foreign policy."

Which, strangely enough, is what Russia is helping Iran do by selling Iran nuclear fuel. And, goddamnit for the Bush case for "all options" on Iran, Iran has agreed to let the IAEA monitor the nuclear power plant it's building. Oh, and the EU said it had "no problem" with the sale. Imagine that: Bush must be right about Putin that, even with the budding tyrant Putin is, "yes" means "yes."

Meanwhile, Putin has used the threat of terrorism to firm-up one-party rule in his nation, to wreck the barely free press, to take control in ways that, despite Bush's, Condi's, and, previously, Colin's protestations, Karl Rove could only dream about while whipping a velvet-cuffed Jeff Gannon in the White House basement.