Reason Why Andy Rooney, Cranky Old Bastard That He Is, Can Still Kick Your Ass:
Because he has a column that indicts, no, destroys, Bush Junior's war using the words of Bush Senior. Goddamn, Thanksgiving must be fun around the Bush house, with Senior, motherfucker that he is, knowing that he's right, Mama viciously defending her babies like a grizzly bear at salmon season, and sons sitting around, looking smug and unashamed. Christ, how the scotch must flow, with Senior staring on, disgusted, drunk, wondering if he should just go to his study, call Gorby, and ask him if he remembers the old days, when evil at least wore a disguise.