These Adorable Haiku Will Melt Your Cold, Cold Heart

The Rude Pundit is burning off the last of 2014 with these remaining haiku from the over 100 he was sent by readers with ambitions for poetry greatness (or with a couple of spare minutes while taking a shit with their smartphones):

From runfastandwin at Hollywood Park (is that a horse-racing tip disguised as a name?):

Boss Cheney and George
love some wicked torture while
yanking each other.

From Benn in Vancouver (is the extra "n" a Canadian spelling?):

The last thing we hear
As we enter the abyss:
Eric Garner's breath

From Jeff in Alameda:

European probe
By landing on a comet
Brightened up my year

From Thomas in Wichita:

Kansas queers can wed
Brownback and pals flip their shit
Equality wins.

From Jack in Central Illinois:

Prevent birth control,
And pay your peeps shit wages.
Nice, Hobby Lobby.

From N in Texas:

From today’s headlines:
Toddler shoots mom in Walmart.
They grow up so fast.

From Sheila in Manassas (Heh. Man Ass.):

McDonnell likes bribes
But not women's equal rights.
Strange Christian logic.

From Linda in Chicago:

Benghazi,oh god,

And we're done. Farewell, 2014. Don't let the cops shoot you on the way out. Monday - a return to regular rudeness.