Teabaggers for Congress: Milton Wolf Is Your Bright-Toothed Asshole:
So everyone's got their thongs all up in their ass cheeks over Rep. Steve Stockman, the blithering nutsack who is running in the GOP primary against Sen. John Cornyn. Stockman has twice been able to con the yahoos and idiots of racist southeastern Texas (motto: "What are you lookin' at, boy?") into voting for him. Honestly, Stockman has about as much chance as a Frenchman against Cornyn. The whole sad exercise just seems like a way for the incredibly dickish Cornyn to seem slightly less deranged.
But that's not the case for every nutzoid cocksucker for Congress running in primaries against already ludicrously conservative, obstructionist, backwards Republican Senators, some of whom actually have a chance to win their party's place on the ballot.
For instance, there's Dr. Milton Wolf, radiologist (so, yeah, sure, technically, fine), distant white cousin of President Obama, Washington Times columnist (which is like saying one is a shit taster), and candidate against Sen. Pat Roberts in Kansas. Wolf is a raging anti-government wad of fuck who is unafraid to link to Alex Jones's Infowars if he wants to make a goddamn point.
Good-looking with a cartoon voice that sounds like Wayne Newton gargling balls, Wolf is a screaming drama queen about all things Obama-ish. IRS targeting conservative groups (even though it totally wasn't)? That's "naked tyranny...We fled a continent and faced unknown mortal dangers to escape it. We fought a revolution to remove it from our shores. Foreign or domestic, we will surely fight it today." If by "fight," he meant, "scamper away with Darrell Issa's tail between our legs," then, sure, yeah.
Of course, Wolf has been endorsed by something called "the Senate Conservatives Fund," a name that seems to require an apostrophe somewhere, but fuck that fancy punctuation.
But let's encourage this dink with good hair, this dumbass who hates "traditional" Republicans but loves him some moose pussy: "It’s time to take a page out of Sarah Palin’s playbook. It’s time to take on the establishment. For the sake of our party and the republic, it’s time to lock and load."
Sure, defeat Roberts and get the nomination. Hopefully, Democrats will actually run someone who has a shot. But even if not, how the hell worse can it get in the Senate?