An Easter Prayer from the Family Research Council:
This week, which most Christians call "Holy Week," but real Christiany Christians call "Passion Week," we members of the Super Duper Prayer Team of the nutzoid evangelical Family Research Council (motto: "Christ died for this?") have been asked to pray because of the sinful activities at the White House's Easter Prayer Breakfast. The Rude Pundit joined the SDPT under a nom de rude some years ago, and every Wednesday he is sent his rusty prayerbone orders for what we gotta drop on our knees for and give Jeezus the high, hard prayin' business.
Now, you might think that the Easter Prayer Breakfast, with 130 religious leaders gathered to dine on ecumenical danishes, is an innocuous event where the President once again shows that, really, he's really, really Christian. But you may as well be sucking the Devils barbed cock while flames burn off your anus hair, you sinning fucker.
Here's how the FRC viewed the event: "Yesterday, President Obama hosted an Easter Prayer Breakfast for 130 clergymen and women in the East Room of the White House. Invited were clergy from Protestant, Catholic and Orthodox traditions, as well as non-traditional groups, among them clergy from homosexual and pro-homosexual denominations, one considered a forerunner in shaping homosexual theology." Yep, it was all about queer-loving. And you know that when Jesus was hanging on that cross in agony, the one thing he was thinking was, "Don't let a black-Muslim-Kenyan president invite the gays to his house to pray to me."
So we on the SDPT are told to "Pray that God will give to us leaders with a Christian worldview, people who know and keep God's eternal laws in public, in private, and in the way they influence public policy." Or it would be simpler to just say, "Pray that God hates fags."