A Defense of Comedians Who Run For the Senate:
Let us say, and why not, that the Rude Pundit wants to write about Washington Post columnist Michael Gerson. Gerson, an evangelical Christian, was one of President George W. Bush's speechwriters for years and has claimed he coined the phrase "axis of evil." In and of himself, the bespectacled apologist for the worst excesses of the Bush administration is worthy of scorn.

But let us say, and, indeed, why not, that the Rude Pundit wished to use an approach called, in Swiftian, Twainian, and Vonnegutian terms, "satire." And, instead of merely directly criticizing Gerson's beliefs, he decided to go in another direction. For example:

Late one night, back in his day at the White House, President Bush was balls deep in Michael Gerson's face as the speechwriter fondled his own prostate to try to get even more pleasure out of huffing on the Commander-in-Chief's cock. When Gerson removed his fingers from his anus in order to grip Bush's dick and give it a few good yanks to possibly quicken the President's semenical release, Bush slapped Gerson's hand away and said, "Not so fast, there, Four-Eyed Freddie, you might have some shit on those digits." Still sucking like a Hoover on deep pile, Gerson reached onto Bush's desk to grab some tissues to wipe his fingers so he might get a clean grasp onto the Leader of the Free World's johnson. When Bush said, "Whoa, whoa, that's enough, I don't wanna jizz too soon," Gerson moved his hand back to his anus to fondle away again, but the President exclaimed, "Wait. I don't wanna have to wait next time you stroke my junk. Here. Use this." And then he handed Gerson a large crucifix adorned with a figure of Christ on it from his desk, which Gerson hesitated about using. "Aw, shit, Four-Eyed Freddie, the feet'll tickle your asshole but good," Bush insisted. Well, Gerson thought, if the President thinks it's okay... And then he thrust the upside-down cross up into his sphincter, the toes of Jesus poking his prostate so that his own erection became more intense. There, fucking himself with the Lamb of God, Bush's saliva-dripping cock shaft moving in and out his mouth, Gerson found the deepest satisfaction of his life, as the meat in a Bush/Savior sandwich.

You see? That right there is satire. It ain't subtle, to be sure. But it is an attempt to degrade people through fantasy in order to reveal something about them and their beliefs.

Gerson, in his latest "column," attacks Minnesota Democratic Senate nominee Al Franken for the longtime writer and performer's comedy from his years at Saturday Night Live and on the radio. Franken has, among other things, imagined graphic sexual scenarios involving Strom Thurmond, mocked the easy access to pornography on the internet (which was really the subject of his much-maligned Playboy essay "Porn-O-Rama!"), and made many, many intentionally sexist jokes that were said with irony and meant as scorn for those who believed such things. Hell, he pretty much drove his co-host off the show on Air America with his character that was a leprechaun with diarrhea. For Gerson, this makes Franken a "vulgarian."

Now, the Rude Pundit's not gonna bother with saying that George W. Bush is vulgar, too, as were Gerson's speeches, but for different obscene reasons. Instead, let's just say that obviously, Gerson, who claims he has no problem with bad words in other contexts, doesn't get it. As he says, "The objects of Franken's humor - including political opponents and women - are not merely mocked but dehumanized. His trashiness is also nastiness. Rather than lampooning the emptiness and viciousness of our political discourse - a proper role for satire - Franken has powerfully reinforced those failures."

And thus we see that Gerson and the Minnesota GOP, who have been propagating this myth that Franken degrades women, are fucking idiots. Other than the fact that the proper role of satire is also to dehumanize one's opponents (remember the Yahoos in Jonathan Swift?), other than the fact, as mentioned before, that the seemingly anti-woman jokes are actually attacks on those who are anti-woman, other than the fact that Rush Limbaugh Is a Big, Fat Idiot, the title of one of Franken's book, is a lampooning of the emptiness and viciousness of political discourse, there's this: Franken's "vulgar" jokes are actually said in the language of the everyday person, across class lines. His comedy was always about using humor to make complex ideas easily digestible.

And if the GOP can't portray Franken as an out of touch elitist (or, ridiculously, a sexist), then Norm Coleman better start packing his hair mousse from his Senate office.