Tom DeLay Amid the Roaches:
The female cockroach emits a perfume that is a siren song to male cockroaches. When she's ready to mate, in one of the most erotic acts of the insect kingdom, the female cockroach will climb to a high point - say, the top of a steaming mountain of horseshit - and tenderly open her wings wide and, in an act of exposure and desire, release the pheremone that will bring her a bounty of males who would mate with her. The female cockroach likes her sex gentle, loving; however, the males are not so kind. Driven mad by the scent of cockroach pussy juice, they wildly, roughly fuck the female. Indeed, roach sex is one of the most crazed, if brief, bouts of fucking in the entire animal kingdom.

Scientists have finally isolated that scent, and now the ripe smell of cockroach fecundity can be used against the males. Traps can be laced with the perfume, drawing out the enlarged and throbbing males. The traps don't work to eliminate all the roaches in an area, but, as with so many things, if one roach is drawn out, in a hotel, a church, a capital building, then surely there are thousands of more cockroaches to be found and killed.

Former exterminator Tom DeLay surely knows the potency and danger of being drawn in by the promise of a scent. He got into politics because he thought environmental regulation was hindering his business. And since that time, for DeLay, the political process has been about a grand pyramid scheme of money and power with the Hammer at the top, a Mafia-like operation where if one didn't obey, one could expect to be crushed like a stoolie in a car compactor. As long as those under him kept the cash flowing upward, DeLay was happy to offer them protection, legislation passage, campaign cash, and, really, baskets of cookies.

All over the Internet, there's a blogasm going on over the indictment of DeLay on a single charge of criminal conspiracy to funnel funds from his PAC to the effort to elect legislators in Texas who would them re-draw the districts of the state to favor Republicans and, thus, enlarge DeLay's coffers in the long run. The good of this right now is the exposure of DeLay's kingdom and, indeed, the Republican Party as the safehouse for greed, corruption, and ill will towards democracy in general. The long-term good may be the defeat of DeLayism, which, unlike Gingrichism, is not an ideology - just a desire for cash and power so you can make more cash to get more power.

While we may not get a conviction, let us relish yesterday's delicious sight of DeLay looking like a man who had just swallowed a poison-coated termite, desperately trying to disengorge himself of the bug, attempting to destroy Ronnie Earle, a man who, if he could touch, DeLay would have had buried alive years ago. If one actually does have the "categorial and absolute" facts on one's side, one does not need to attack the opposition with the viciousness that DeLay attacked Earle yesterday. Roy Blunt, the new House Majority Leader, is just a DeLay lackey, but let us pause and believe for a moment that the evil are punished.

Yes, Tom DeLay has smelled that roach aroma, luring him into more and more blatant acts of political depravity, and now he must pay at least some moral price for his failings, for entering the trap. If you looked deep enough into DeLay's eyes yesterday, you understood his fantasy life, of flying onto that pile of horseshit, of sniffing all over the thorax of the female roach, who delicately closed her wings, closing off her pheremones to any other males, of rubbing her pronotum with one of his six legs before fondling her cerci, of roughly entering her roach pussy after unfolding his roach cock, of fucking away while staring at the other male roaches who answered her call but now slink away, back into the dark, dank, dirty corners.