8/01/2005

Boy Scouts For Baghdad:
So the President of the United States went to talk to the thousands upon thousands of Boy Scouts gathered in Virginia for their annual jamboree/death march. There, he praised them for being just like most Americans (or, at least, most Americans who get a month-long vacation from their jobs) by saying, "You also understand that freedom must be defended, and I appreciate the Scouts' long tradition of supporting the men and women of the United States military." Yep - wave yer little flags and say you support the war; that's all ya need to do, children. And while he gave them the suggestion of joining the USA Freedom Corps (even droppin' a URL in there to look all hip and shit), he missed an amazing opportunity.

Why not recruit those little patriotic fuckers for our declining Army and Army reserves? Hell, we know the scouts are not gay - at least if no one's askin', no one's tellin' - and we know that a vast majority of them can handle the Iraqi heat, even if the President himself punked out on going to speak outdoors at Fort A.P. Hill until it was more temperate. Shit, the event was at an Army base - you wouldn't even have to pay travel expenses.

Of course, the speech was a bit embarassing when the President talked about how he got a deferment from his camping duties when he was a scout so he could run a classmate's campaign for Student Council at Andover. (No, that's a joke. George W. Bush was way too much of a pussy to be a Boy Scout, although he did love snorting coke off a friend's Cub Scout pocket knife.)

Note: The Rude Pundit will be on a reduced writing schedule for the next two weeks as he prepares for his upcoming very rude show in New York City. There will still be daily postings here, but they will be mucho shorter.